DEAR ABBY: I am asking that you get the word out to veterans across the country and encourage them to start a Veterans in the Classroom program in their local schools. We started the program described below after a history teacher called for help in teaching her students what the war was really like. These are stories that cannot be found in history books.

One veteran from each branch of service, and from both the European and Pacific theaters, make up the program panel. Before the presentation, we ask that students submit five questions that interest them most. During our presentation, we try to address as many of those questions as possible. Each vet covers the following topics:

1. A brief personal history from enlistment to overseas departure.

2. Arrival overseas -- where, when, major battles, etc.

3. A close-call story.

4. A funny-experience story.

5. Time for questions and answers.

6. Display of memorabilia that students can view and discuss with the vets, one-on-one.

The program is videotaped so that the true stories, told firsthand by the vets who experienced them, can be shown to future generations of students. Local press and TV are invited. Presentations by veterans from Korea, Vietnam and the Gulf War could follow.

Our Veterans in the Classrooms program has been well received, and our wish is that other veterans will put on programs such as this in their local schools. We would be happy to serve as a resource for other veterans groups.

Thank you, Abby, for helping us encourage other vets to keep this important part of America's history alive. -- RALPH H. GEORGE, FOUNTAIN HILLS, ARIZ.

DEAR RALPH: What a terrific idea, and what a precious resource for students in the classroom. I'm sure other veterans will agree that your concept has merit and will be willing to step forward and volunteer their stories.

Not all students grasp the concepts of history by reading and memorizing dates in textbooks. History teachers who would like to give their students a more immediate sense of these events could contact their local VFW posts and request speakers from each branch of the service.

Veterans who are interested in setting up programs like this one can contact Ralph George by writing to him at 14425 San Carlos Drive, Fountain Hills, AZ 85268. By sharing your stories you'll walk into the classroom as strangers and walk out as heroes.

DEAR ABBY: Is it wrong to blow your nose at the table when dining out, or for that matter, anytime at the table? -- SNEEZING IN NORTH JERSEY

DEAR SNEEZING: Much would depend upon how it's done.

Dabbing a leaky nose is acceptable if it's done discreetly and is certainly better than suffocating. However, if the nose blower sounds like the first blast of Gideon's trumpet, it should be done away from the table and in private.

What teens need to know about sex, drugs, AIDS, and getting along with peers and parents is in "What Every Teen Should Know." To order, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: My husband is a CEO of a large company. He does business with many other companies and travels all over the country. We are both 65 years old.

He has made it a practice to hug and kiss -- on the mouth -- all the female CEOs and associates he does business with. I'm not comfortable with this because I think it is unprofessional. (He's had several affairs in the past.)

He calls them "honey," "darling," etc. -- they are the age of our daughter (40).

I want him to stop this practice. Do you think I am being small and narrow-minded at this stage of the "game"? -- CONCERNED IN THE SOUTHWEST

DEAR CONCERNED: Considering his past infidelities, I don't think you are being small and narrow-minded.

Calling these women "honey" and "darling" may seem affectionate to him, but it indicates a lack of respect for them as adult women.

Tell him that as the CEO, he is in a position of power, and if he makes inappropriate remarks or advances to women, he could be slapped with a sexual harassment lawsuit -- or just slapped, period.

DEAR ABBY: I was shocked that you agreed with "Diane in Scappoose, Ore.," who wrote that children in shopping carts should be put into the automobile before the groceries.

With all the car-jackings going on, the last thing you should do is put your children in the car first. I attended a briefing given by the police department, and one of the things they say you should never do is put your children in the car before the groceries. It takes only a second for a car-jacker to demand your keys and jump in and drive off.

Groceries can be replaced -- children cannot. The best thing to do is keep the cart beside you while you load the groceries. -- LIZ IN DELAWARE

DEAR LIZ: You weren't the only reader who informed me that I goofed when I put "the 'grocery cart' before the horse."

Parents, please make sure that the grocery cart doesn't roll away with your child in it while you load the groceries into your car. And when you are finished, please remember to secure your children in a car seat or safety belt.

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I had a very small church wedding. She refused to consummate our marriage for nearly two months and wouldn't tell me the reason why. It was not because she was afraid to have sex, because she was not a virgin when we married. When she finally gave in, I could hardly keep up with her.

Our wedding anniversary is coming up soon. On what date should we celebrate our anniversary? The date we were married in church, or the date our marriage was consummated? -- WANTS TO CELEBRATE

DEAR WANTS TO CELEBRATE: The date on the marriage certificate would be fine in most cases, but in your case, celebrate on the date that means the most to you.

To order "How to Write Letters for All Occasions," send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Letter Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: Mother's Day always brings back memories of an incident that happened three years ago.

For the past several years, after attending church on Sunday, my wife and I have stopped for lunch at a Chinese restaurant. We have become acquainted with a young man who works there. He escaped from Vietnam with his family in a rickety old boat when he was very small.

Our daughter, who lives in Dallas, had sent my wife a beautiful Mother's Day corsage to wear to church as an expression of her love. The young waiter exclaimed how beautiful the flower was, and asked if it was for a special occasion.

We explained that in the United States, on this particular day children often send their mothers flowers as a token of appreciation, honoring their motherhood. The young man said they did not have this custom in Vietnam, but that he thought it was appropriate.

He left our table, then returned a few minutes later. He stood there looking embarrassed, then hesitantly said, "I think this tradition of honoring your mother on a special day is wonderful. Please allow me to pay for your meal today in honor of my mother, who suffered so many hardships in our small boat when we escaped from our homeland to the internment camp in Singapore."

My wife and I sat in silence for a few moments. Then, with tears in her eyes, my wife told him we would be honored to accept his gracious offer.

Now on the day set aside to honor mothers, we cherish not only the memory of our own mothers, but also the memory of this remarkable Vietnamese mother we have never met. -- JIM ISBELL, FORT WORTH, TEXAS

DEAR JIM: Your letter brought tears to my eyes, and I'm sure its inspirational message will move many other readers. Thank you for sharing this lovely memory.

DEAR ABBY: This is in response to letters you have printed about handling obscene phone calls. I would like to share one of my experiences, as well.

Several years ago, I had a caller who was saying the most disgusting things over the phone. When I refused to answer, my machine picked up the call, and he continued the obscenities. Finally, I dialed star-69, and he answered. I asked him if he knew who I was. He replied, "No." I then informed him that I was the woman he had been calling all morning, that his phone number was on my bill, and if he called one more time, I would have him arrested. He never called back. -- FREE FROM HARASSMENT IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR FREE: Three cheers for star-69 -- which is a telephone company add-on feature that allows you to dial your last caller. You're a quick thinker.

DERA ABBY: What should we give my son's teachers at the end of the school year? They've been terrific, but I've run out of ideas.

What would you or your readers suggest? -- A PARENT IN OREGON

DEAR PARENT: Teachers may already have drawers full of scarves, ties and stationery from previous years, so when in doubt, ask them what they would like. If the classroom has been short on supplies, consider giving them much-needed items such as pencils, construction paper and art supplies.

To receive a collection of Abby's most memorable -- and most frequently requested -- poems and essays, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby's "Keepers," P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)