CONFIDENTIAL TO "IMPATIENT TEEN": Although it may seem to you that time is standing still, before you know it, you'll be old enough to date. Henry Van Dyke summed it up nicely in the poem "Time Is":

"Too slow for those who wait,

"Too swift for those who fear,

"Too long for those who grieve,

"Too short for those who rejoice,

"But for those who love,

"Time is eternity."

DEAR ABBY: The rules for dieting during the holidays you printed prompts this letter. I want to tell you and your readers about my weight loss and recovery from compulsive overeating through Overeaters Anonymous.

Before I found OA at age 19, I had failed at every diet I tried. I wasn't able to stop shoving food down my throat. Back then, I could easily consume eight candy bars, a pint of ice cream and half a pizza in one sitting -- then wait for the food to digest so I could go back for more. My emotional state, as you might imagine, was equally tortured. I had suicidal thoughts.

Luckily I found OA which, as many know, is based on Alcoholics Anonymous and has a spiritual component. I walked into my first meeting a confirmed atheist, but I was so desperate that I was ready to try anything. And it worked!

I lost 45 pounds, Abby, but more important, I have kept it off for more than 18 years. One of my closest friends lost 102 pounds through OA and has kept it off for nearly two years. My sponsor, who guides me through the program, lost 250 pounds and has kept it off for 27 years. I'm not making that up.

Incredibly, I don't miss the foods I used to wolf down. I eat nothing sweeter than fresh fruit, and I haven't been plagued by the relentless cravings I used to suffer. OA changed the way I relate emotionally to food. I love life now, and often can't wait to get up in the morning.

Please tell your readers they can find OA in the phone book under Overeaters Anonymous or through directory assistance. -- GRATEFUL IN L.A.

DEAR GRATEFUL: I'm delighted to do it. I hope your letter will inspire others who are waging the battle against compulsive overeating and who are unaware that help is available.

Overeaters Anonymous has more than 8,000 groups in 58 countries. Local chapters are listed in the telephone directory. There are no dues or fees, and no membership lists are kept. The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop eating compulsively. There is no shaming, no weighing and no embarrassment. You will be welcomed with open arms into a fellowship of compassionate women and men who share a common problem.

There are chapters in almost every city, but if you have difficulty finding one near you, visit the Web site: www.overeatersanonymous.org, or send a long, stamped, self-addressed envelope to OA World Service Office, P.O. Box 44020, Rio Rancho, NM 87124-4020.

Abby shares her favorite recipes in two booklets: "Abby's Favorite Recipes" and "Abby's More Favorite Recipes." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 per booklet ($4.50 each in Canada) to: Dear Abby Cookbooklets I and II, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in price.)

DEAR ABBY: For the last nine years, thousands of your readers have written and called us at the American Optometric Association to apply for free eye care available to low-income working people through VISION USA.

Although this service helps people of all ages, VISION USA 2000 will mark the start of the program's emphasis on aiding children. This focus aligns with VISION USA's commitment to "America's Promise -- The Alliance for Youth," a program headed by retired Gen. Colin Powell and dedicated to helping "at risk" youth.

Each year, more than 7,000 optometrists donate their services to VISION USA. Since the program's beginning, free eye exams have been provided to more than a quarter of a million children and adults. Among those helped was an 8-year-old boy diagnosed with a detached retina. The VISION USA optometrist arranged for eye surgery at no cost, which saved the boy's vision.

An 11-year-old girl who was extremely nearsighted had broken her glasses and her parents couldn't afford new ones. After a new pair was donated, she reported that she could now see the chalkboard even from the back of the classroom. One young girl was thought to have a learning disability, but after an eye exam, it was discovered that she was farsighted and had a high degree of astigmatism. With glasses, she is now able to see, and her schoolwork has improved considerably.

We hope you will alert your readers to the VISION USA 2000 program. Application forms are available now from VISION USA, 243 N. Lindbergh Blvd., St. Louis, MO 63141, or on the AOA Web site (www.aoanet.org) in the "Meet the AOA" section (click on the VISION USA logo). Many libraries now offer free Internet access for persons without a home computer. Completed forms must be postmarked by Jan. 20, 2000.

Abby, we appreciate your support of VISION USA. You are helping many hardworking, deserving people and their children to see better and to have healthy eyes. -- HARVEY P. HANLEN, O.D., PRESIDENT, AMERICAN OPTOMETRIC ASSOCIATION

DEAR DR. HANLEN: I'm pleased to help spread the word.

Readers, from Jan. 3 to Jan. 31, 2000, low-income working people can be screened for eligibility for VISION USA by calling (800) 766-4466. Phone lines will be open weekdays from 7 a.m. to 9 p.m. (CST). Interested persons are encouraged to apply early, in writing, because of the heavy demand for the phone lines in January.

To qualify for the free eye care, persons must: have a job or live in a household where there is one working member; have no health insurance that covers eye examinations; have an income below an established level based on household size; and have had no eye exam within the last two years. Eligibility requirements may vary in some states.

DEAR ABBY: I have recently become aware of my impressionable personality. Growing up as a child I used to help my father roll joints and eventually started smoking pot. During my college years, my roommate was a purse-snatcher and I started snatching purses with him. Just recently, I started a job with a man who cross-dresses. The high heels are ruining my feet and I don't look very good in miniskirts. Please help me. -- SUGGESTIBLE IN LAS VEGAS

DEAR SUGGESTIBLE: You not only have an impressionable personality, you also have a bizarre sense of humor. I suspect you also know someone who writes crank letters to advice columnists.

Your "problem" will become an asset as soon as you start surrounding yourself with people who are involved in constructive activities such as volunteer work. Please don't wait.

What teens need to know about sex, drugs, AIDS, and getting along with peers and parents is in "What Every Teen Should Know." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: When I read your column about "huffing" chemicals, I had to respond.

I was a teen-age solvent abuser. For most of my early school days, I was an overachiever. I was not popular, but I had one or two good friends and was active in Scouting and volunteer activities. Because I was into books and getting good grades, by junior high I was teased and beaten up by my schoolmates. High school brought more of the same merciless harassment. I began to withdraw into solitary activities and discovered model building.

My descent into hell began innocently. I loved to build model cars, boats and planes. I discovered that the fumes from the glue gave me a buzz. Soon I was buying as much as a tube of model glue a day and huffing the fumes. I staggered around in a fog most of the time, couldn't remember things, and my grades slipped badly.

I heard something on the news about kids who had died as a result of sniffing Pam. I decided to try that as well, secretly hoping it would kill me. I huffed a number of other aerosol products, too. In my depression, I tried to kill myself by taking an overdose of aspirin. No luck. After the second overdose, a friend began dragging me along to activities and events and focused my attention on other things. My depression lifted, I managed to pull myself together, and I finished high school near the top of my class.

A couple of years later depression set in again. I dropped out of life and began huffing glue again. I huffed myself into unconsciousness and even a couple of seizures. Paranoia and hallucinations became the norm. I woke up once and found myself carrying on a conversation with a tree -- yes, it was answering back! The police were called when I was found running around with a knife, sure someone was out to get me. I was hospitalized on at least three occasions.

Fast-forward 20 years: What do I have to show for my stupidity today? I stutter, and confuse similar-sounding words in conversation. My hands shake. I frequently have problems remembering things for more than a few minutes. Worse yet, I'm now allergic to fragranced items including fabric softeners, detergent, hand lotion, perfume, cologne, hairspray and household cleaning items. Did you know that perfumes contain toxic chemicals such as toluene -- the same stuff that's in model glue?

Even though chemicals make me horribly ill, the craving to abuse them never quits! On a good day, I hate myself for the damage I've done to my brain and body. On a bad day, I wish I had succeeded in committing suicide years ago.

Parents: Pay attention to your children and their behavior. Have your children taken an unusual interest in being alone? Does their breath, clothes or room smell funny? Do they have balance problems while walking across a room? Difficulty sleeping? No appetite? Paranoia? Grades falling? Apathetic? Personal hygiene lacking? Do you find plastic bags with strange-looking dried-up white stuff in them? Your children could be abusing glue or aerosol products!

Get them help -- and don't take "no" for an answer. Abusing household products is as dangerous as abusing illegal drugs. -- SENSELESS IN SEATTLE

DEAR SENSELESS: You may never know how many people you have helped today by giving such a graphic warning to teens and their parents. Your letter is unmistakable proof that substance abuse may mask an even deeper problem, and a caring, tuned-in parent should not minimize or ignore it.

What teens need to know about sex, drugs, AIDS, and getting along with peers and parents is in "What Every Teen Should Know." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)