DEAR ABBY: After reading the letter from "Wondering in Florida" (who sent only a congratulatory letter upon receiving graduation announcements from young relatives she barely knew), I only wish she were my daughter's acquaintance.
Our daughter is sensitive and caring, and she keeps in contact with friends and family. However, months before her high school graduation, she explained why she wouldn't be sending out any announcements. Her reasoning? In her mind, such pronouncements are all too often regarded by the sender and receiver as a request for a gift. Unfortunately, graduation, engagement, wedding and baby announcements tend to carry this unspoken message, although I hope that was not their original intention.
Including a note that no gift is necessary would only draw attention to the subject. Too bad there's no easy way to reverse the trend, but if more recipients did what "Wondering" did, families and friends would begin to see the real meaning behind the announcements sent to them. In our daughter's mind, "Wondering" wouldn't have been. -- NO ANNOUNCEMENT FROM ILLINOIS
DEAR NO ANNOUNCEMENT: Your letter may be a step in reversing the trend. The purpose of an announcement of any kind is to share good news. No gift is required in response. A warm letter of congratulations is the most that is necessary, and the most that should be expected.