DEAR READERS: Yesterday I printed some of the avalanche of mail I received when I asked readers to tell me how they just said "No" to sex. During the rest of this month I'll devote one column a week to other terrific responses.

DEAR ABBY: Parents are their children's most valuable sex educators and should not only provide them with "the facts," but also make sure they are familiar with the most frequently used "lines" they'll hear, so they won't fall for them.

They include: "You would if you loved me." "Everyone's doing it!" "I won't hurt you." "I'll still respect you." "I'll stop when you say so." "No one will ever know."

It's important that young women practice what they'll say before they are faced with the situation, because in the heat of the moment it's often too late. Josh McDowell, the author of "How to Help Your Child Say 'No' to Sexual Pressure," has provided the following pressure lines and possible answers:

Line: "Everyone's doing it."

Reply: Then you won't have a problem finding someone else.

Line: "If you love me, you'll have sex with me."

Reply: If you love ME, you'll respect my feelings and stop.

Line: "Want to get in the back seat?"

Reply: No, I'd rather sit up front with you.

Line: "Sex will only cause our love to grow."

Reply: Into what? Parents?

Line: "You don't know what you're missing."

Reply: That'll make two of us!

Line: "Don't worry, I'll use protection."

Reply: You're going to need protection when Daddy finds out what you're trying!

-- JOYCE LE BRIGHT, MILFORD, DEL.

DEAR ABBY: My response to boyfriends who want sex: "Show me an income, enough responsibility to be a good husband and that you want to be a great father, and I'll have sex." It worked for me.

Girls who are afraid of being rude should remember: Don't be afraid of being rude, because once he finds out that he's going to be the father of your child and will have to support it until it's of legal age, he won't think twice about being rude to you by denying he's the father and trying to ditch you and the baby.

The "reward" for a date should be your company. It shouldn't be sex. -- DEBORAH FROM TACOMA, WASH.

DEAR ABBY: My daughter dated a young man she was crazy about for only five weeks when he began pressuring her for sex. Here's what she told him: "OK. It'll cost you about $75."

He asked her why.

"You'll need it for the license, the minister and the motel," she replied.

He said, "I get the point." Three months later he married her. -- PROUD MOTHER IN TAMPA, FLA.

DEAR ABBY: The concerned counselor who told you the teen-age girls she counsels are getting pregnant after "going out" with a guy needs to update her knowledge of the modern vernacular. The phrase "going out" has replaced "going steady," and carries with it the implication of an intimate, long-term relationship that probably does include sexual intercourse. Those teen pregnancies she's encountering are more than a case of girls being unable to "just say no." -- JERRILYN KAPLAN, ALAMEDA, CALIF.

DEAR JERRILYN: You're right about the vernacular, but not necessarily correct about the teen-age girls.

DEAR READERS: My next column on how to rebuff unwanted sexual advances will appear on Wednesday, Sept. 11. Stay tuned!

DEAR READERS: If you would like your letter considered for publication, please include your name, area code and telephone number.

What teens need to know about sex, drugs, AIDS, and getting along with peers and parents is in "What Every Teen Should Know." To order, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR READERS: A few weeks ago, I printed a letter from a counselor in Pasadena, Calif., who was alarmed by the number of teen-agers who get pregnant. At her suggestion, I asked my readers to tell me how they just said "No" to sex. I was unprepared for the flood of letters that poured in from women of all ages (and even some men) eager to share not only their ideas, but also their experiences. I regret that space limitations prevent me from printing all of their letters. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: In college in the mid-'70s, I heard what I considered the best response ever. A friend of mine rejected the advances of a classmate by informing him that she had the opportunity to inherit a million dollars -- but only if she remained a virgin until age 25. After college, I used that ploy on more than one occasion (adjusting the age upward as necessary), and it worked for me, too. One young man even offered to help me remain a virgin if I'd cut him in for a percentage.

But the way my daughter handled the situation was even better. She recently attended her second junior high school dance, where she was introduced to a young man from another high school. While dancing and conversing, the boy became "grabby." My daughter mentioned it to me at breakfast the next morning, and I asked how she handled it.

She said, "I told him I wasn't ready for that kind of relationship and furthermore he was making me very uncomfortable, so to please stop it!" He promptly stopped. They continued dancing and talking, and a week later the boy called to invite her to a dance at his school.

This proves she didn't have to be rude or lie; the truth works, and good guys appreciate honesty and nice girls.

Young women shouldn't fear that they'll lose a good man if they refuse inappropriate sexual advances. The guys that "just don't get it" are not the ones a girl could have a meaningful relationship with anyway. -- FEMALE ATTORNEY, MELBOURNE, FLA.

DEAR ABBY: You asked how to say no to sex. For me it was easy. I told them, "If I have sex with you and get pregnant, you'll leave me. But my mother will KILL me." It worked every time, and the bonus was they continued to date me and respect me. -- BEEBIE IN PHOENIX

DEAR ABBY: As a Christian, I don't believe Jesus approves of premarital sex. So when I was dating, I reminded myself that Jesus was sitting there with me -- and I would ask myself if he would approve of what I was doing. Sure, it was hard sometimes. But I figured if he would rise from the dead for me, it was the very least I could do for him. Needless to say, I remained a virgin until I married.

Even if you have already slept with someone, it's never too late to say no -- and after that, don't ever put yourself in a tempting situation again.

The campaign called "True Love Waits" is a great way for young people to make the commitment to either remain a virgin or to become "secondary virgins." A secondary virgin is one who promises to abstain from sex frOm that point on until marriage. Most Baptist churches (as well as other denominations) have information on this campaign. Spread the word, Abby. It's worth the wait. -- GLAD I WAITED IN MISSISSIPPI

DEAR ABBY: Diplomacy is nice, but in matters of sex, it's better to be blunt. "No" is all you need to say, and "Because I don't want to" is the only argument you need to give.

On three separate occasions, different men told me I needed to see a psychologist and get some therapy. Apparently they believed that any woman who would pass up sex with them must be emotionally disturbed.

I'm now 29 years old and still a virgin. I haven't had to deal with gonorrhea, genital herpes, chlamydia, pregnancy or AIDS. In spite of the fact that I still haven't seen a therapist, I'm very happy.

As for the three men who were so concerned about my mental health, I never saw any of them again. I can't even remember their names. -- SHARON IN STATE COLLEGE, PA.

DEAR READERS: More on this tomorrow ...

DEAR READERS: If you would like your letter considered for publication, please include your name, area code and telephone number.

What teens need to know about sex, drugs, AIDS and getting along with peers and parents is in "What Every Teen Should Know." To order, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR READERS: I'll be on vacation between Aug. 18 and Aug. 31. Don't panic -- I've selected some of my favorite letters from past years to fill the gap. I hope you enjoy them.

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I are having a big fight with her dentist. My wife is getting a full set of dentures. All her life she was ashamed of her teeth because they were yellowish, and now she wants snow-white teeth, but her dentist won't give them to her. He says snow-white teeth look unnatural. Abby, she doesn't care; she says movie stars have snow-white teeth and they look beautiful, and she wants beautiful white teeth too.

Meanwhile, her dentist keeps telling her that his job is to give her teeth that will look natural, and if she suddenly comes out with snow-white teeth, people will know the teeth are dentures, and they'll think her dentist did a poor job. We are deadlocked. Should a dentist give a patient what she wants or what he thinks she ought to have?

We live in Maine, but if we have to go to California to get what we want, we will go there. And I wouldn't begrudge the cost, either. Help us. -- UNHAPPY SENIOR CITIZENS

DEAR UNHAPPY: The dentist discharged his professional obligation when he told your wife that the kind of teeth she wants will look unnatural. Having said this, and being overruled, he should give her what she wants. If he refuses, there are plenty of other dentists in Maine.

DEAR ABBY: My husband is the head of a large corporation. He does not drink hard liquor, but very few people know this because at parties he takes one drink and pretends to sip it all evening.

He watches his junior executives' drinking habits very carefully, and they are promoted accordingly. Anyone who takes more than two drinks is passed over for promotion -- no matter how good a job he does.

I feel that my husband should have a talk with the man and give him a chance to cut down. He says, "No, once a drunk, always a drunk." He says it takes guts not to drink in today's society, and he needs men with guts to run the business right. What is your opinion? -- SCARSDALE

DEAR SCARSDALE: If everyone who takes more than two drinks is (as your husband states) a "drunk," there are a lot of "drunks" effectively running a lot of businesses.

I agree, it takes guts not to drink in today's society, but one who takes a drink publicly and "pretends" to drink it so no one will know he's a non-drinker is lacking guts himself. If guts is the issue, the person who says, "No thanks, I'm an alcoholic" has far more guts than your holier-than-thou abstainer.

DEAR ABBY: I am an attractive 66-year-old widow. I've dated a number of eligible men and have had many proposals, but there is one I would really like to marry.

He is 72, but looks much younger because he keeps in shape and has a young and healthy outlook on life. He says he "loves" me, but he will not propose marriage because he had surgery 10 years ago that terminated his sex life.

I told him it didn't matter to me because I never placed very much importance on sex anyway, which is the truth.

He insists that I was only being "kind," and eventually I would feel cheated. I swore to him on a stack of Bibles that I meant what I said. How can I convince this wonderful man that I want to marry him -- regardless? -- AUSTIN, TEXAS

DEAR AUSTIN: Get a higher stack of Bibles.

DEAR READERS: If you would like your letter considered for publication, please include your name, area code and telephone number.

Good advice for everyone -- teens to seniors -- is in "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It." To order, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)