DEAR ABBY: I hope my letter will spare someone the sorrow of losing a little kitten.

During the night, my cat's three kittens climbed atop the tires of my car. As I approached the car, I noticed a pair of tiny paws on my left rear tire and moved the kitten to safety. Upon checking the other wheel wells, I found the two other kittens, each one on top of a tire. Unfortunately, while I was moving the others to safety, the first kitten returned, unseen by me, and resumed its perch. He's at the vet now, in very guarded condition, and may not make it.

I have seen numerous other kittens on top of tires since. It appears to be a common practice with kittens. They should be taught that cars are things to fear and avoid, no matter how inviting they may be. So, as cruel as it may seem, if the weather is warm, I hose down the wheel wells whenever I see a kitten there. If it's cold, I just fetch them out and keep my fingers crossed.

I've heard of grown cats climbing into motor compartments in the wintertime, but I've never heard or read about kittens resting on tires. I'd bet more kittens are killed this way than cats seeking warmth from a motor. Please say a word or two about it; it may spare a lot of grief. -- THE HON. H. HAYWOOD TURNER III, COLUMBUS, GA.

DEAR JUDGE TURNER: Thanks for the warning.

DEAR ABBY: I am disappointed with your response to a letter signed "Old-Fashioned Grandma."

I've been reading your column for years and usually your responses are pretty open-minded, but the fact that you agreed that adult nudity in the presence of young children was cause for concern shocked me.

A father showering with his 3-year-old daughter (as I do with my son) is completely natural and teaches children that the human body is nothing to hide. Keeping "boy stuff" and "girl stuff" separate at such a young age only instills sexual stereotypes and causes sexual hang-ups in adult life. There is nothing sexual or wrong in showering with a young child.

As for bathroom privacy, my children know that a closed door means "Mommy wants privacy" (or whoever is in there), but they often walk in when I leave the door open.

You should have told "Old-Fashioned" that "Jimmy" showering with Mommy (or "Jenny" with Daddy) is totally natural. Today's parents are trying to raise their children without the hang-ups that they have had to overcome from THEIR "old-fashioned" upbringing. -- DISAPPOINTED IN TORONTO, CANADA

DEAR DISAPPOINTED: The letters I received from readers show your attitude to be far more popular than mine -- especially with the parents who are currently raising children.

Ten whacks with a wet diaper for me!

DEAR ABBY: When I bought a new exercise bike recently, a friend asked me if she could have my old one. I gave it to her thinking she would use it.

After a short while, I found out that she had sold it. Am I wrong in thinking she should have asked me if I wanted it back? Or at least offered to split the money she got from selling it?

I'm really having a big argument about this with my husband. -- NO NAME, PLEASE

DEAR NO NAME: When you gave your friend the bike, it was hers to do whatever she chose to do with it. The money she received from the sale of the bike was also hers to do whatever she chose to do with it. Your husband is right.

To receive a collection of Abby's most memorable -- and most frequently requested -- poems and essays, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby's "Keepers," P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: Your recent reprint of a letter about the importance of being a good neighbor compelled me to write to you for the first time in 30 years.

Being too friendly with the neighbors can be risky business. What if it turns out that you don't really want to be friends with these people after you get to know them better? Then what do you do -- move?

Abby, neighbors should respect one another's privacy.

I have had neighbors who seemed to think that because I was always nice to them, they could preach their religion to me, tell me how to vote, dress and raise my kids. Sometimes I wish I'd never said more than a casual hello.

My idea of a good neighbor is one who is cordial, minds his own business and is willing to help in an emergency.

If a friendship develops over the years, fine. If not, you've still got a good neighbor. -- MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS

DEAR MINDING: There's an old saying, "Too thick doesn't stick." Before you and your neighbors became neighbors, you were strangers. After getting to know one another, you -- and they, too -- can decide how much you want to see of one another.

DEAR ABBY: A letter you published recently reminded everyone not to store a fire extinguisher above the stove. In the event of a fire, you might not be able to reach the fire extinguisher. Having experienced a car fire at our home a few weeks ago, we learned a few more fire-safety tips the hard way.

Place a smoke detector in your garage. Car fires can start after the engine has been turned off, and since most of us keep flammables like paint and paint remover in the garage, a smoke detector located near these items can save lives and property.

Small fire extinguishers that can be easily lifted and used are great, but you probably need several located throughout your home. Don't store them in the most likely place for fires to break out, i.e. above the stove, in the water-heater closet or near the furnace.

In our case, we were able to reach our extinguisher and nearly had the car fire under control when our lone extinguisher ran out. If we'd had even one more, the fire could have easily been controlled before the fire department arrived. -- DEBI MEANS, PLANO, TEXAS

DEAR DEBI MEANS: Good advice. Readers -- are you listening? (I hope so.)

DEAR ABBY: Re computer voicemail systems: The best defense is a good offense. Here's what I'm tempted to record on my machine:

"If you have a Touch-Tone phone, press one; if not, I am sorry, I will not be able to communicate with you at this time. For my name and address, press two; occupation and marital status, press three. To learn my husband's name and occupation, please press four. Press five if you'd like to talk to me, and press six if you'd like to talk to my husband. Frustrated and forgot why you called? Press seven. To have this message repeated, press eight. For a busy signal, hang up, try again, and have a real nice day. -- VIEW OF IRATE CONSUMER EXPRESSED, MINDLESS ANSWERING IS LOATHSOME

DEAR V.O.I.C.E.M.A.I.L.: I am sorry, the advice columnist you dialed is either disconnected or not in service at this time. Please check the number you dialed, and call again ... and again ... and again.

Abby shares more of her favorite, easy-to-prepare recipes. To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, More Favorite Recipes, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: Recently my husband's sister told us she bought a wolf-dog puppy from a couple she knows who raises them. The pup is about 3 months old and is 75 percent wolf.

I have expressed my concerns to her about the safety of keeping such an animal as a pet. She has two sons who are 13 and 15.

She says a lot of people keep wolf-dogs as pets in her state (Arkansas), and there doesn't seem to be any problem with them.

She is open to any information I can find for her on the subject, and she's told her sons that if there is any problem with the animals, she will get rid of the puppy.

That's fine, but I'd hate to have one of her children attacked and injured.

I have children her sons' ages, and have told her they are not allowed to go near this animal. She's coming to visit us next summer and plans to bring her wolf-dog along.

Abby, do you have any information or advice on these wolf-dogs? Thanks for any help you can give me. -- WORRIED IN VISALIA, CALIF.

DEAR WORRIED: Although owners may argue that some wolf- dog hybrids are less aggressive than some breeds of dogs, the experts are nearly unanimous that owning a pure wolf or a hybrid is a bad idea.

After reading your letter, I located an article by Jack Hope in the June 1994 issue of Smithsonian magazine. It states that as most wolves and wolf hybrids approach sexual maturity (at about 2 years of age), the vast majority begin behaving as the pack-hunting predators their wild genes have predisposed them to be.

"As all owners agree, the animals treat humans as other wolves. But, genetically programmed for the ongoing struggle with pack mates for food and leadership, they have no compunctions about challenging the dominant householder -- usually the male -- with warning growls and a flurry of bites (usually NOT deep bites) for his steak dinner or easy chair, or even for the attentions of his spouse.

"How to curb unwanted behavior is a subject of debate. When only swatted or yelled at, the wolves may not turn tail but growl and bite instead. Disciplined with a severe beating, they'll retreat -- but, wolflike, will attempt the same challenge an hour or a day later -- in an endless contest for dominance.

"Banished to the back yard, the wolves or wolf hybrids usually break free of all but the sturdiest chains or enclosures. Without food, confused, they may prowl the neighborhood attacking cats, rabbits, goats, dogs, even horses, all of which they see as prey. Their predatory instincts can also be triggered by humans, especially if those humans happen to be small or infirm, or if they flee or emit a frightened sound.

"Since 1986, nine children in the United States, from toddlers to a 12-year-old, have been killed (and in one case, partially eaten) by wolf and wolf-dog pets. Many more people, both children and adults, have been maimed. While relatively few of these animals actually kill, most of the former owners interviewed for this article report having been bitten."

For an excellent guide to becoming a better conversationalist and a more attractive person, order "How to Be Popular." Send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby Popularity Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)