DEAR ABBY: I am a full-time mother of two precious children -- a 3-year-old and a 6-month-old -- and I absolutely love my job. Although there is no material compensation, the rewards are very sweet.

However, it has become clear to me that there is not much respect for those of us who choose to stay home and put our careers on hold. I can't tell you how many times I've been asked, "So when are you going back to work?" These people do not seem to understand that I work 24 hours a day, seven days a week. It's not all fun and games; there's a lot of hard work involved in raising two children.

This job is not meant for everyone, but I resent the lack of respect I am shown. I respect those who choose to work outside the home and feel that I deserve the same. Perhaps those who think this job is easy and trivial should try it for a few weeks. Spending a few days in my house would definitely change their outlook.

I have decided that we full-time mothers need a new title. I started telling people that I am an "investment broker" -- I specialize in futures. It has raised more than a few eyebrows and I no longer hear the rude comments. -- CARA BOUDREAUX, TEXAS CITY, TEXAS

DEAR CARA: I appreciate your pointing out that full-time mothers are "investment brokers." It reminds me of Roseanne's first appearance on the Johnny Carson show when she described herself as a "domestic engineer."

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 28-year-old female. I have a college education, make a good living, teach aerobics, and people tell me I'm beautiful.

I have had dates, but I just can't seem to "connect" with anyone. This is a very painful and lonely way to live.

My alcoholic mother rejected me when I was a child, but my siblings were accepted. My father was a harsh, critical man who rarely praised us kids or showed any affection. I've tried therapy and would like to go again, but can't right now because I live overseas.

When strangers learn that I'm not married, they sometimes ask me why. I am too ashamed to admit I'm single because no one wants me, and I can't think of an appropriate answer. Abby, what should I say? -- NEEDS HELP FAR FROM HOME

DEAR NEEDS HELP: It is not necessary to give a detailed explanation about why you are still unattached. Just smile and say that you haven't met the right man. (It's the truth.)

Because you feel you would benefit from more counseling, but it is not available where you are, I urge you to seek out an Al-Anon Family Group for support. These groups are fellowships for relatives and friends of alcoholics. It's an established fact that alcoholism is a family disease, and you have been affected by it. (Everyone growing up with an alcoholic parent is affected in some way.)

Trouble with relationships is common for those who lived in an alcoholic environment as a child. Al-Anon helps adult children of alcoholics heal the emotional scars that can leave lingering pain and affect personal relationships, self-esteem and a sense of family life.

Al-Anon chapters are worldwide, and literature is available in French, German, Portuguese, Spanish and English. Like AA (Alcoholics Anonymous), Al-Anon is as near as your telephone book. Please check it out and let me know what you think.

For Abby's favorite family recipes, send a long, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Cookbooklet No. 1, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: I read your column and find it entertaining and often educational. But I think you have a problem. Today I read a "true" story in your column about a woman who couldn't remember the name of someone she ran into on the street. As she racked her brain, the other lady mentioned something about her brother. Figuring it might give her a clue to the lady's identity, the woman asked, "Your dear brother -- what is he doing these days?"

"He's still president of the United States," she replied. (She was Calvin Coolidge's sister.)

Well, Abby, that's a cute story, but it cannot possibly be true. President Coolidge's only sister died in 1890, many years before he became president in 1923.

If you print this, please do not use my name. -- TEXAS READER

DEAR TEXAS READER: Well, hit me with a history book -- but please, not too hard because I'm beginning to feel like a battered woman. I apologize for the error.

DEAR ABBY: Regarding "Frank's Wife in Springfield, Va.," whose husband wouldn't help with the thank-you notes for their wedding gifts: Thank you for printing her letter. It makes me realize once again how fortunate I am.

My husband and I have been married for almost six months. Not only did he help me address and mail all 250 of our wedding invitations, he also willingly helped me write and mail all of our thank-you notes. I'm a very lucky woman and say a prayer of thanks each night before I go to sleep.

My husband cooks most of the meals (he is an excellent cook, I might add) and helps me clean up afterward. On the weekends, he might do something with a friend from work, but only if it doesn't interfere with something that we might do together. This includes going to church, going shopping and cleaning our home.

He does little things for me all the time, and brings me little surprises such as my favorite snack or a bouquet of flowers. "Anything to make you happy," he says. I hope he realizes that he can't possibly make me any happier than he made me six months ago.

I don't think this is something that will soon pass. My husband and I dated for many years before we were married, and he treated me this way when we were dating.

I wanted to send you a new twist to the "husband" letters. Your single female readers need to know that thoughtful, wonderful men do exist. -- DAVID'S WIFE IN TENNESSEE

DEAR DAVID'S WIFE: Thanks for the reminder. From time to time I get letters from men telling me they are disillusioned because they were taught to treat women with respect, and for that they have gotten nothing but rejection. You knew how to recognize a man with quality. May you both enjoy many healthy, happy years together.

To receive a collection of Abby's most memorable -- and most frequently requested -- poems and essays, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby's "Keepers," P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: During the past year, we all have been made aware of tragic cases of severe child abuse and neglect. Sadly, three children die each day in our country as a result of maltreatment. Those who died, most of them under the age of 5, were harmed by the same people who were responsible for their care.

During April, National Child Abuse Prevention Month, thousands of people in small towns and large cities throughout the nation work tirelessly to encourage public awareness of child abuse and its prevention. The National Committee to Prevent Child Abuse (NCPCA) supports these efforts and encourages everyone to become involved in preventing child abuse before it occurs. If every adult did just a little, fewer children would suffer pain, injury or death due to abuse.

SEVEN STEPS TO STAMP OUT CHILD ABUSE

1. REPORT suspected abuse or neglect. Inform authorities if you suspect that children are being harmed. Your concern may mean that children are protected from an abusive environment.

2. ADVOCATE for services to help families. Communities need comprehensive services that address issues which affect families. Parenting programs, health care and housing needs are vital to maintaining healthy children and families.

3. VOLUNTEER at a local child abuse program. Parent support groups, crisis centers and hot-lines are typical programs that often welcome volunteers. Check your telephone directory for the names of agencies in your area.

4. HELP A FRIEND, NEIGHBOR OR RELATIVE. Someone you know may be struggling with parenting responsibilities. Offer a sympathetic ear or a helping hand. Assisting occasionally with child care or offering to locate sources of community help can be a tremendous boost to someone under stress.

5. HELP YOURSELF. Recognize the signs that indicate outside help is needed. If you feel overwhelmed, constantly sad, angry and out of control, get help. Remember, asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

6. SUPPORT AND SUGGEST programs on child abuse prevention for local organizations. Kiwanis Clubs, Exchange Clubs, PTA, church groups and women's and men's clubs all offer excellent opportunities for raising public awareness in the community.

7. PROMOTE programs in schools. Teaching prevention strategies can help to keep children safe from those who would abuse them.

Abby, your readers are the most caring people in the world, and I know that once alerted, many of them will take this national problem to heart. That's what it takes, individuals as well as organizations. -- JOY BYERS, NATIONAL COMMITTEE TO PREVENT CHILD ABUSE

DEAR JOY: I was shocked to learn that more than 3 million children are reported as victims of child abuse and neglect each year. I urge readers to contact the NCPCA for more information on preventing child abuse. Call 1-800-55-NCPCA to request material, or write P.O. Box 2866, Chicago, Ill. 60690.

Good advice for everyone -- teens to seniors -- is in "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It." To order, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)