DEAR ABBY: I am 32 years old and people say I am very attractive. A year ago I started seeing "Alex." He was everything I ever wanted -- handsome, intelligent, successful. We were together almost every night, and he even started talking about marriage.

Then last month, out of the blue, he announced that he thinks we're getting "too serious" and we should both start seeing other people. That was the beginning of the end. It's like a bad dream. I can't stop crying. I'm in sales and my job requires my full attention, but I'm in a fog.

My eating is out of control. The night before last, I ate a whole barbecue chicken, a large pizza and three cheese Danishes. Tonight I consumed a pint of ice cream and almost a whole bag of cookies. My stomach hurt so bad I couldn't finish the cookies.

Abby, I dial his phone number 15 to 20 times a day just to hear his voice -- then I hang up. I'm sure he knows it's me. I'm humiliated he would dump me like this. How can I get him back? I love him! -- OUT OF CONTROL IN LOS ANGELES

DEAR OUT OF CONTROL: You may not be able to get him back, but you must regain control of your feelings and behavior. What you describe isn't "love," it's compulsive behavior. Dr. Susan Forward has written a book for people who can't let go of relationships that aren't working (or have ended) and find themselves feeling out of control. It's titled "Obsessive Love" (Bantam). Pick up a copy and read it. It will help you shift from pain and anxiety to healthy patterns of healing/recovery. Good luck.

DEAR ABBY: I am the man who found the $42 in the glove compartment of the secondhand car I had recently purchased. And I am married to a woman of good character in Anchorage, Alaska. Here is the rest of the story:

Since pocketing the $42, I have put that much (and more) into this vehicle, after replacing the brakes and a computer part, and being towed twice. I find I am now $550 in the hole -- minus the $42.

Rabbi Botnick related the parable about the rabbi whose students had bought him a donkey to help him in his business of selling flax. The students were amazed to find a precious pearl attached to the neck of the donkey, whereupon they informed the rabbi that he could retire -- a rich man!

The rabbi responded, "I bought a donkey, not a pearl," and he promptly returned the pearl.

I have to wonder if the pearl would have been returned if the donkey had come up lame the next day. I expect your response will be similar to my wife's -- that the car trouble may have been a consequence of my action.

I don't buy that -- and I'm not returning the money! -- THE HUSBAND OF THE WOMAN OF GOOD CHARACTER

DEAR HUSBAND: Only a fool would buy a donkey without carefully examining it to make sure it wasn't lame. And only a fool would buy a secondhand car without having it examined first by an automotive mechanic.

Most teen-agers do not know the facts about drugs, AIDS, and how to prevent unwanted pregnancy. It's all in Abby's new, updated, expanded booklet, "What Every Teen Should Know." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: Please tell "B in Dallas" her confession about faking orgasms made my day, my month, my year! I know that God will forgive me this small deception. Actually, it's an act of kindness; it makes my husband feel so virile and masculine. I truly love him, so it's no great sacrifice on my part. -- MISSOURI FAKER

DEAR ABBY: Why "fake it"? Enjoy it! I was married to the same man for nearly 50 years and my sex life died when he did. I'm a great-grandmother now, but if I could find a nice clean man between 70 and 80, believe me, I wouldn't have to fake it. Please don't use my name. I live in a senior citizens complex, and if my neighbors knew I wrote this, they'd have a coronary. -- CITRUS HEIGHTS, CALIF.

DEAR ABBY: All the world is a stage, and everybody fakes enjoyment of something at some time. Some husbands fake enjoyment of opera, the symphony, ballroom dancing and other activities their wives relish. Unselfish people are accustomed to accommodating others. -- A MALE'S PERSPECTIVE

DEAR ABBY: I simply submit to sex as my wifely obligation to "service" my lusty husband. To him, sex is just another bodily function. I always leave the lights on so I can read something until he's finished. -- SUBMITTING, NOT FAKING

DEAR ABBY: Hooray for "B in Dallas" for admitting she's "faking it." I'm a 55-year-old woman, married for 33 years, and I've had enough sex to last me a lifetime. But I'm starving for love! -- BEL AIR FAKER

DEAR ABBY: I don't have to fake it anymore "just to get it over with." Sex is great now that the kids are out of the house and I'm no longer on the Pill. -- PARADISE VALLEY, ARIZ.

DEAR ABBY: Those fakers out there should quit blaming the man. If they have to "fake it," they just aren't willing to figure out what feels good -- and then explain it to their partner. The man is going to have a good time whether she fakes it or not.

Woody Allen once said, "The first organ a person must use to achieve sexual satisfaction is the brain." -- TOM IN MICHIGAN

DEAR ABBY: I am a 55-year-old woman and have been married twice, and I'm not sure I've ever experienced an orgasm. Oh, I may have had one once when I was 17, and I was so overcome, I nearly blacked out. It's just as well it never happened again. -- MARIE IN MADISON

Want your phone to ring? Get Abby's booklet, "How to Be Popular" -- for people of all ages. To order, send a long, business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Popularity Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054. (Postage is included.

DEAR ABBY: I've been waiting for years to see a letter like the one from "B in Dallas." (She said she faked orgasms.) I'm glad to know I'm not the only woman who does this. Now I'll feel less like a freak. Please print all the letters you get on the subject. -- SACRAMENTO FAKER

DEAR FAKER: I could not believe the volume of mail. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: Of course I fake it. All women do. I adore my husband, but he couldn't find my erogenous zone with a road map, so I go through the motions to keep from hurting his masculine ego. -- DESERVES AN ACADEMY AWARD

DEAR ABBY: Most men have the rabbit habit: hop on, hop off. Athletes know that in order to perform well they must warm up first, perform, then cool down. The act of making love is no different. If men followed these instructions, women wouldn't have to fake it. -- MIDWEST COACH

DEAR ABBY: My darling is 65 and he's still making it. I'm 63 and still faking it. When I read about these men who are still active at 85, I shudder. I don't think I could survive another 20 years of this. Dear God, don't they ever wear out? -- LONG ISLAND FAKER

DEAR ABBY: Married for 22 years. Been faking it for 20. -- CHATTANOOGA "ACTRESS"

DEAR ABBY: I fake it just to get it over with. Sex never was as important to me as it is to my husband -- but it's so good for his ego, I'd never let on that all my wild carrying on was an act. We've been married for 44 years. He's faithful and so am I, and ours is a loving, solid marriage. -- CANADIAN FAKER

DEAR ABBY: I am 33 and my husband is 28. He's a wonderful man but a lousy lover. I don't dare get him too excited or it's all over before it's begun. We've been married for six years and we really love each other, so I can live with it. -- FAKING IT IN ST. PAUL

DEAR ABBY: My neighbor and I were discussing our inadequate sex lives over coffee one day. She said she often "fakes" orgasms with her husband, then I confessed that I also did with mine.

We decided to massage each other, and found it more satisfying than our husbands' efforts. Our husbands don't know the difference, and we are ... TWO WIVES HAPPY AT LAST

DEAR ABBY: Your reader thinks most women "fake it." Well, here's one who doesn't have to. Even though my husband is 79 and I'm 76, sex is still fun. We love to have our children visit us for a day or two, but when they leave, I put the red satin sheets on the waterbed, turn on some soft music and don my sexiest nightie. Then, let the fun begin. Believe me, faking isn't necessary. -- HAPPY HONEY IN HONOLULU

(More "fakers" tomorrow.)

Everything you'll need to know about planning a wedding can be found in Abby's booklet, "How to Have a Lovely Wedding." To order, send a long, business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Wedding Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054. (Postage is included.)