DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: One of my friends in elementary school started calling me “the Prankster” because of the hilarious tricks I used to play on even our favorite teachers and girls I had a crush on. The name sort of stuck, and by high school, my friends were calling me “TP” for short, which you have to admit is funny, especially since pranks are what they count on me to pull at all sorts of times and places.

I started seeing someone I hooked up with a few times when we were both on our year abroad in Italy. After we got back, we lost touch, but then she moved not too far from me, and we reconnected.

Compared to the other girls I’ve been with, she is what my dad calls a “quality woman.” He said he doesn’t get what she sees in me. (My dad’s a funny man too.)

I thought she was good with my pranking people, but she told me she doesn’t think some of what I do is very funny, and some of it is outright cruel.

I never think of myself or what I do for a little fun is cruel. Even when I went back in my mind over some of my pranks, they seem more like just a fun thing to do, with no one getting hurt.

I really like this girl, and I want this to work. But I don’t know if I like her enough to change who I am. I figure if she doesn’t get me, we’re not going to work.

How do I get her to understand I never mean to be mean, and pulling pranks is a big part of who I am, and what people have come to expect from me? --- NATURALLY A PRANKSTER

DEAR NATURALLY A PRANKSTER: You don’t give any examples of what you consider a benign prank, so it’s not possible to get a feel for what mischief’s potentially caused through your attempts to be funny.

That someone you admire finds your behavior out of line is possibly a good indication that perhaps you do go too far at least sometimes, and/or that you and your girlfriend have very different ideas of what constitutes humor. In my experience such disconnects lay the groundwork for a major divide between two people.

It sounds to me like your future as a couple depends on either your conforming to your girlfriend’s standards of humor, or her coming around to accept yours.

If neither of you is willing to meet in the middle, it doesn’t bode well for the longevity of your relationship.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My mother-in-law just turned 67. She dresses and acts much younger, and it seems kind of weird to my husband and me.

She is divorced and has been for a long time, but now she just started talking about getting out in the dating world more, since she and the guy she had been with broke up when he moved closer to his son’s family somewhere out in the Mid-West, where my mother-in-law had no interest going to.

I love my mother-in-law, and don’t want to hurt her feelings, but it might be better if she hears she’s acting weird for someone her age from people who love her and respect her.

My husband suggested she and I go shopping for more age-appropriate clothes and do a make-up redo for a more appropriate look for someone her age.

Is that a little too much? I think it is, but sitting her down and telling her she may not be coming off the way she thinks she is could be the only thing to save her being embarrassed if she does get back into dating.

Which do you think is the right way to handle this? --- DON’T WANT HER EMBARRASSED

DEAR DON’T WANT HER EMBARRASSED: I’m pretty sure neither the proposed “talking to” or shopping/make-up excursion is appropriate or called for.

Your mother-in-law’s a grown woman, with her own ideas of self-image and plans for how she wants to run her life.

It’s not a bad thing you’re worried about how others will see her. That shows you and her son care about her happiness. But I can’t think of too many adults who wouldn’t be inclined to take offense at an involuntary make-over or a stern talking to — no matter how well-intentioned.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: We started our family when my husband and I were in our late 30s. To make up for lost time, we planned our two pregnancies close together, meaning our two boys are less than 18 months apart.

Both our boys went all out into sports when they were kids. Whatever his big brother did, the younger one had to follow on. They both played soccer, baseball, and spent most of their summer vacations from school in camps to improve their sports skills. One boy excelled in soccer, the other in baseball, although they both worked hard at both sports. Our younger boy even got to play with his brother on the varsity team because he was pulled up from junior varsity in his sophomore year to round out the roster.

Our older boy helped his varsity team make it to the state championship in soccer, and his brother was both an all-county all-star and on the all-state baseball team because of his pitching.

I know the boys love each other and would do anything for the other one, but they have always been so damn competitive, it drives their dad and me crazy. It started when our younger boy was 6 and started playing t-ball, and got worse all the time growing up. It was mostly about sports, but it regularly spilled over into school grades, early jobs, and just about anything else. If one did a thing that got some attention, the other had to do something similar, if not better. To this day they have to top one another in sometimes crazy ways.

Within three months of his older brother becoming engaged, his younger brother popped the question to his girlfriend. Now they are both planning weddings four months apart for next year.

Next up my husband and I joke will be a baby derby, which we don’t mind, as we both look forward to being grandparents and we love both our future daughters-in-law. But it gets exhausting sometimes, this always having to compete.

Do you guess there will ever be a time when they will just be happy being brothers, and not have to be a step ahead of each other? --- HOPING FOR A BREAK IN THE COMPETITIONS

DEAR HOPING FOR A BREAK IN THE COMPETITIONS: My simple answer is that although it may wax and wane, I doubt your sons will completely back away from their competitiveness anytime soon, if ever.

This isn’t to say they can’t or won’t be each other’s best ally through life’s ups and downs. And, while it’s sometimes wearing on those around them, there might potentially be some positive points in their ongoing competition if it results in each young man raising his game and continuing to grow, if just to keep in step — or slightly ahead — of his brother.

So long as your sons get along in most contexts, and particularly are willing to help each other if the time ever comes when they’ll need to pull together, I don’t suppose there’s too much to fret over what sounds like a fairly standard case of sibling rivalry.