DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Out of everyone in my family, I’m the only one who gives a crap about what’s really happening in this world. They all just go along with everything and say stuff about how it’ll all right itself in the end. My mother is especially like that, and I sometimes can’t figure out how I came to care so much when she doesn’t care at all.

My baby sister is getting married late this summer, and she asked my mom to tell me that for everyone’s sake, it would be better if I and my girlfriend, who feels about most things the way I do, did not come to the wedding. My mom said that because of what happened at the last couple of family gatherings, she agrees it would only end up in my fighting with everyone else about their indifference.

Doesn’t this smack of hypocrisy, especially since my family is made up of mostly “good God-fearing Christians”? --- BANNED FROM WEDDING

DEAR BANNED FROM WEDDING: You’re clearly someone with passionate convictions, and being willing to take a strong stand on issues can be a good thing; but so too is having the ability to discuss and appreciate topics other than those that you’re fired up about.

You may find you’ll be better received by your family and others if you develop a knack for toning it down some, which isn’t a betrayal of your beliefs. Rather, it’s an acknowledgement that the world is made up of all kinds of people with an incredibly wide range of opinions and convictions, and you can both learn from and perhaps even educate others in your way of thinking if you work towards being less vehement and more accepting of the fact that the majority of the people you know don’t share your priorities.

In the case of your sister’s wedding, it’s her day, and it isn’t hypocrisy for her and the rest of your family to want to avoid a potential disruption of it.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My cousin and I have a tradition of vacationing together that goes back to when we were still kids. Our families would rent a cabin in a state park halfway between her house and mine. We made a ton of great memories and promised to continue the tradition when we were grown up.

As much as I love and enjoy being with my cousin, we are very different people. Her idea of a good time is clubbing and (my dad’s favorite word) “shenanigans,” while mine is sightseeing and binging on favorite shows. In the past, we ended up going on vacations that didn’t have enough of either option, and if the trips weren’t a waste of time and money, they were disappointments anyway.

This will be the first time in three years that we’ll have the same time off together this summer. She wants to go to Boston and has been looking into places to stay near some of her old college hangouts. I wanted to go to North Carolina’s Outer Banks, where we went one time with our families when we were both teenagers and I remember really enjoying.

As a compromise, I proposed we each take a couple extra days and do a mini-road trip, with us spending a few days in each place. We could either hop an extra flight between places or do a one-way car rental. We’re both good with the extra expense, since we haven’t gone anywhere in a long time, and we both banked enough PTO to pull it off.

I think this is a good compromise because both destinations have plenty of each of our favorite ways to spend time, but my cousin is still holding fast to her Boston plan.

Don’t you think my suggestion has the best potential of making us both happy? --- DOWN FOR SPLITTING TIME

DEAR DOWN FOR SPLITTING TIME: I do like your idea of a few days in each spot so you both get time with your favorite pursuits. However, since it doesn’t look like an acceptable plan to your cousin, perhaps another option would be to rotate who gets to pick the vacation destination, with the first trip determined by a coin toss or other classic method with 50-50 odds. One qualification should be that the other person’s preferences must be considered when picking the location.

If suitable compromises can’t be reached, it may be time to step back from shared vacations and find other ways to get together in the future.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My son and daughter-in-law recently started running a small B&B in a quaint historic house in a quaint historic town that’s traditionally a big vacation destination. It has been a dream of theirs to open their own business since before they were married, and they held off opening until this spring, to give COVID a chance to run its course. But the clock has been ticking on their loans, and the few advance bookings they have won’t come close to making their commercial mortgage payments for the foreseeable future.

My husband and I are worried about them and we know they are struggling to make ends meet. He and I have discussed between us the idea of offering them a private, no-interest loan to help them survive until the business takes off, which we are confident it will do, but most likely not as quickly as they hope it will.

I watched my own parents’ marriage fall apart because of financial pressures, not unlike what the kids are now facing. They are so good together, I would hate to see the same thing happen to them.

Do we kibitz preemptively, or just wait until they come to us, which we both fear may be too late to be of much use? --- WORRIED FOR THE YOUNG BUSINESS OWNERS

DEAR WORRIED FOR THE YOUNG BUSINESS OWNERS: It may not be a bad thing to casually float an offer of a loan to your son and daughter-in-law. Even if they opt to say, “Thanks, but no thanks,” it’d potentially be nice for the new business owners to know they have at least one fail-safe available to them, should they need it. However, I’d avoid pushing the offer too hard. You don’t want it to look like you have no confidence in them and their venture.

Before taking the loan idea to them, you might want to consider tacking on a token interest payment. That way, the offer would perhaps come across less like a hand-out and more like a business arrangement, which may be more palatable to the borrowers. You could always gift back any interest to them at a later date, if you wanted to.