life

Diet Crazes Frustrate Dad

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | August 6th, 2020

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My daughter seems to be on a different “best diet” every month or so. She doesn’t even particularly need to lose weight, but she reads about something that’s super healthy, or purgative, or muscle building, or whatever everyone’s worrying about fixing this year.

I keep telling her that a sensible, well-balanced diet is all she needs. Instead, she spends a fortune on stuff she ends up throwing out once it goes out of fashion or expires. I also don’t know how good some of this stuff is for her.

Why can’t people just eat right, and, heaven forbid, do a little exercise? --- PRACTICAL DAD

DEAR PRACTICAL DAD: It sounds like your daughter is simply continuing an ongoing tradition of trying to take steps to be in control of her health and/or her body image.

Since some of the hottest dieting and “health enhancing” trends can be expensive, and in some cases outright dangerous, if any red flags pop up while she’s on the latest and greatest regimen, talk seriously to her about your concerns for her health and her wallet.

However, if there aren’t any alarms going off, while it may be frustrating to you, it hopefully isn’t anything to worry about, and you should let your daughter find out for herself what works and what doesn’t.

life

Neighbors' Noisy Sex Life Causes Problems for Young Mother

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | August 4th, 2020

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: After my husband and I divorced, I moved with our four-year-old daughter to a two-bedroom apartment not far from my mom’s, which works out, since she helps with my daughter when my ex can’t.

It’s a nice building overall, but it is far from sound-proofed, and we often can hear what goes on in our neighbors’ apartments. The two women who live right above us are partiers of the first order, and they specialize in overnight guests and lengthy sex sessions that are loud enough to wake both me and my daughter up, sometimes several nights a week.

I certainly do not want to come off as up-tight, and I honestly don’t care what they do, but I have a young child who asks questions and is cranky in the morning because she doesn’t always get enough sleep.

I can’t afford to move, and I don’t want to make enemies of my neighbors, but do you think I should let them know that we hear what they’re up to? --- NEED MY REST

DEAR NEED MY REST: I don’t think it’s unreasonable to let your neighbors know the sounds of their leisure pursuits make it past their four walls and floorboards.

If you’re not comfortable having it come directly from you, you could consider contacting your landlord/lady or the management company in charge of the building. You have a young child to think of, and that can certainly be stressed when you approach either the neighbors or the building people.

life

Sister Who Frequently Asks for Help Never Helps When Asked

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | July 31st, 2020

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Whenever my sister needs help (which happens a lot!), my mom, stepdad, and I always do what we can to help her and her husband out. It also always seems to happen that whenever one of us needs a hand with something, she and her husband are never available. Since she used to be more helpful before she got married, we are thinking this is coming from her husband, who is not at all close to his own family.

How do we let my sister know her helping would be greatly appreciated, and that it does not feel very fair that there is not reciprocation when we ask for help? This has been especially upsetting since my stepdad’s cancer diagnosis and treatments. --- COULD USE A HAND SOMETIMES

DEAR COULD USE A HAND SOMETIMES: It’s entirely possible your sister’s getting caught between her husband’s preferences and your family’s needs. This could mean too many requests might result in her feeling as if she has to make a choice between the two sides.

Rather than putting in a lot of small requests, perhaps you could try directly approaching your sister with a specific call for help only she — without her husband along — can render. Let her know how much her stepping in, even this one time, would mean to your parents.

If she finds herself unable to meet you this far, her loyalties are clear, and you would save yourself some frustration by finding other ways to get things done. Sometimes a little walking away is a big sanity saver.

Family & Parenting

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