DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My grandma still lives in the house she raised my mom and uncle in. Now, she is alone there and when the bad weather hits, she is not able to shovel her walk and front porch so she can get out if she needs to.

There was a family that used to live right next-door to her and their teenage kids would always make sure Grandma got shoveled out. They would even get her car cleaned off — all free of charge.

There is a new family in their house now, with kids about the same age as the ones who moved out, and the first time it snowed after they got there, they knocked on my grandmother’s door and asked how much she would pay them to shovel her walk.

She was sort of hurt by this. Maybe she was spoiled, but what is happening to people these days that they don’t think about helping their neighbors?

Having good people next-door to my grandma was peace of mind for my family, but we don’t have much confidence in the new people. I don’t know what else she can do, but I want to say something to those neighbors the next time I make the drive to see Grandma. I guess that wouldn’t help though, would it? --- WHAT’S WRONG WITH PEOPLE?

DEAR WHAT’S WRONG WITH PEOPLE?: Although you’re clearly concerned, your approaching the neighbors may not make any difference.

Some communities have help available to seniors when it comes to clearing snow and other as-needed home maintenance issues, provided either fee-free or for a voluntary donation. If none of your family lives near your grandmother, you could check around to see if any churches, youth organizations, or senior service centers provide the kind of help your grandmother needs during the winter months.

If, however, the best she can do is hire the kids next-door, you might want to make sure everyone agrees on a reasonable and set rate, so there’s less chance of your grandmother being taken advantage of.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: So, I have a situation with my husband. 

His two best friends are getting married. I mostly get along OK with the groom, not so much with the bride. I also really dislike going to weddings. 

The thing is, my husband wants me to go and has gotten upset with me for asking him if it’s really necessary.

Apparently, it would cause tension between him and his friends if I don’t attend.

I just didn’t want to have to sit through a wedding, especially since he’s going to be participating as best man, so I’d practically be alone for the whole affair.

What do you think? --- WANTING TO SIT THIS ONE OUT

DEAR WANTING TO SIT THIS ONE OUT: I get your reluctance to attend the wedding essentially on your own, since your husband will be wrapped up in his job as best man. However, this is something important to him, and sounds like it falls under that umbrella of married life means compromising sometimes.

If possible, you might want to find out if your husband will be expected to remain with the wedding party throughout the reception, sitting at a head table, for instance. Since the current trend in weddings is a sweetheart table rather than a dais, then he should be able to be with you after the ceremony. If not, perhaps you could see if you would be allowed a plus one so that you’d have someone to keep you company, and hopefully make the wedding more enjoyable for you.

To all my readers and those they love, best wishes for a Happy Valentine’s Day!

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My daughter’s husband is one of those people who never sits down. That’s not the problem, even though our daughter is the most laid-back 27-year-old you can imagine.

What gets me is that for all the projects he starts, my SIL never gets around to finishing anything. He bounces from one project to another, and although I’m not one for labels, I sometimes worry he’s manic or hyperactive, or both.

I also worry that his habits will lead to a home that’s full of unfinished “improvements”, and a life for my daughter that’s constantly unsettled.

Do I say something to my daughter, or just keep my lips zipped? --- TO ZIP OR NOT TO ZIP

DEAR TO ZIP OR NOT TO ZIP: Since you have at least one grown child, this can’t be the first time you’ve faced this occupational hazard of parenthood.

While I get your concern and frustration, if your son-in-law’s never-ending-never-finishing habits don’t bother your daughter, and aren’t presenting any health or safety risks, I fall on the “keep it zipped” side of your quandary.

This is something your daughter and her husband have to deal with for themselves, if they even see it as an issue to be dealt with.