DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: About six months ago I moved to a new city for my job. It’s a start-up tech company made up of twenty-somethings like me.

My coworkers like to drink hard, especially on the weekends. I have gone out with them a few times, but don’t enjoy it very much because they rag on me about not drinking and think I’m a whuss.

Back home and in college, all my friends knew I don’t drink, mostly because of a family history of alcoholism, including both my parents and my older sister.

I don’t want to tell my coworkers about my family, because I don’t think they would understand. But I am running out of excuses and feel bad about always putting them off, especially since these guys are the only people I know here.

Do I tell them why I don’t drink, or just keep finding excuses not to join them? --- NON-DRINKER IN A DRINKING WORLD

DEAR NON-DRINKER: You have an excellent reason ─ not just an excuse ─ to take a pass on drinking, and I see no reason for your not sharing it with your coworkers. Even if they don’t fully understand, you would no longer have to dodge them outside the office.

Another thing you should consider is widening your social circle in your new city. Pursue some of your own interests and you might just make some new friends who are into the same things you are.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My oldest, best friend asked me to move in with her and her little boy after her poor excuse for a human being of a husband ran out on her.

That was three years ago, and while I am glad I was able to help her out, and save on the amount of rent I have had to pay (she charges me next to nothing), I feel like it’s time for me to move back on my own again.

But I just cannot shake the guilt of leaving her on her own, not just financially, but with her son, who has come to look at me as a favorite auntie.

What’s a good way to make the move-out less painful? --- NEED TO MOVE OUT

DEAR NEED TO MOVE OUT: After three years, it’s understandable for you to feel you all need to be getting on with your lives.

Start by giving your friend plenty of notice so she can make alternate arrangements if she needs the rental income.

After the move, make sure they know you’re still there for them, even though you’re no longer living in the same home. For example, consider establishing a set night where you join them for a meal and an evening, or you could babysit on a regular basis so your friend can make plans to go out.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My grandma still lives in her own home, but she has health issues that are more than my grandpa can handle alone, so for the past few months they have had a home healthcare worker coming in a few hours a day to help out.

This girl is gorgeous, and more than a little sweet. I have a huge crush on her, but I can’t make a move in front of my grandparents because my parents don’t want them to know I am gay. They say they would not understand, and it would really upset them. I’m not sure if there is even any mutual interest, but I am getting some vibes that there might be, and I have started stopping by to visit most days after I finish with classes.

How do I take the first step without upsetting my grandparents? --- LIKE THE GIRL

DEAR LIKE THE GIRL: It’s possible your grandparents aren’t as clueless as you think they are. For instance, unless you were in the habit of stopping in to see them most days, your suddenly doing so could be a pretty good indicator you have an additional motive to visit.

If you’re feeling a connection with the caregiver, I don’t see any reason you can’t exchange contact information, just as you’d do with any other new acquaintance. If your grandparents have figured things out, they won’t be shocked, and if they haven’t, they’ll just think you two are striking up a friendship.