DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I am going to come off as a real b—ch, but I really don’t want my sister, who has been in and out of drug rehab for at least the last three years, around my kids. Even though they’re still young, we just never know how my sister is going to be when she drops by, or who she’ll be bringing along for the ride. I love my sister very much, but I love my kids too. Am I right to ban her? --- SISTER OF AN ADDICT

DEAR SISTER OF AN ADDICT: Your first and most important responsibilities lie with taking care of your own family. If you’re not comfortable having your sister around your young children, then you’re absolutely right to keep them apart, at least until they’re of an age to understand more about what their aunt is dealing with. That doesn’t mean you can’t offer your love and support to your sister in other ways.

Instead of having her come to the house, why don’t you propose getting together for an adults-only meal or other kind of outing you might both enjoy? If it works the first time, maybe make it a regular event so that you two can keep the lines of communication and support open.

DEAR READERS: I want to take advantage of this holiday dedicated to sharing thanks to express my gratitude to you all for reading and commenting.

Whether you agree with my answers or not, I’m usually impressed, and often touched, by your willingness to share what you’ve learned along the way with total strangers, whose stories sometimes remind you of your own.

Thanks also to those who find my typos and offer their own brand of advice, which often proves quite educational.

From my home to yours come best wishes for a blessed and happy Thanksgiving. --- ASK SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I know it shouldn’t be a big deal, and I shouldn’t take it personally, but I have a friend who NEVER directly responds to texts or voicemails or snaps. I know she’s getting my messages, because she’ll reply immediately, but it’s almost guaranteed to be something completely off-topic. I’ve heard some of our other friends complaining about her doing this, especially when it messes up getting together. She insists she wasn’t told something about time or place and gets all pissy because she says I don’t tell her anything.

I like being with my friend, but I wonder if she’s really not getting what I’m trying to tell her or just trying to shove the blame on me when something goes wrong, even if I show her the texts we both sent. What can I do to get this woman on track? --- FRUSTRATED FRIEND

DEAR FRUSTRATED FRIEND: One thing you can try with a reliably unreliable responder is to keep it simple. Don’t cover more than one point per message, which makes it easier to piece a conversation back together, should the need arise.

The other thing you can do is to ask her, repeatedly if necessary, to confirm that she got the message.

Neither tactic is a guarantee, but maybe if she gets tired of being babysat and badgered, she’ll start getting the message ─ in more ways than one.