DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I have played softball with “Pat” for years. We started out in the kid’s rec leagues, were on the same travel team, and this past spring both joined the same adult rec team. Pat is a good player and friendly during the season, and always has been. For a few months each year she and I are pretty tight. Then, as soon as the season is over, Pat not only disappears, but she rarely bothers to return calls or texts. It is as if I become invisible the minute I am no longer part of her regular schedule.

This has been going on for years and I know it shouldn’t still bother me, but it does. Am I doing something wrong, or is she? --- THE INVISIBLE TEAMMATE

DEAR TEAMMATE: There are some people who compartmentalize their lives so completely that they’re uncomfortable when elements from one compartment spill over into another. Pat may have that mindset, and if so, don’t take it personally. If you enjoy being with her within the context of softball, then just go with it, accepting the reality that Pat, like opening day, will be back next season.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My great-grandmother recently passed away. When I was little we would always spend at least one of the holidays at her apartment and we would stay for a few days. My cousin, who is the same age as I am, and I would play dress-up using some of our great-grandmother’s old clothes. She even let us put on her old fur coats, which I remember weighed a ton and made us sweat.

Now that she is gone, we found out she left one of the fur coats each to my cousin and me. While we both think this was a sweet gesture, neither of us wants the coats, but we don’t know what to do with them. We figure they may be worth something. Any suggestions? --- COVERED IN FUR

DEAR COVERED: Unfortunately, real fur coats these days are not generally worth nearly what they were when they were in vogue. But if you’re not looking to keep them, you still have a few options for what to do with your legacy ─ although none of them is likely to make you much, if any money.

You could consider donating them to a local coat drive, thrift store, or theatre company; consigning them to a shop that accepts vintage furs; listing on eBay; or checking into organizations that collect old furs to repurpose them into a variety of pet and household items.

Whatever you chose to do with the coats, you’ll hopefully be honoring the memory of an important lady in your lives.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My father-in-law and I get along very well. But the one thing we always disagree on is his getting to a doctor more often. Although he is only in his late 50s, he is a large man, with diabetes and a family history of heart disease. He lives alone, and I worry about something happening to him, not to mention he almost never goes to the doctor, and if he does he almost never follows their advice. I worry it will take a crisis for him to realize he needs to be under more careful medical supervision. How do I get him to take his health more seriously? --- CONCERNED DAUGHTER-IN-LAW

DEAR CONCERNED: You could start with a firm offer to drive him to his medical appointments. Then, if he’ll allow it and you haven’t already done so, get yourself and/or your spouse on your father-in-law’s approved contact list with his doctors. This will put you in the loop of his medical care.

If neither of the above work out, try bringing providers to him through mobile health services, if available in your area. You could also take on preparing or buying diabetic-friendly meals and eating them with him when you can. And, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to contact your local chapter of the American Diabetes Association, which is a good source of information, including diabetic lifestyle guidelines and where to find support groups for caregivers as well as those living with diabetes.