DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I work in a small office with only about 15 people most days. While there isn’t a formal dress code, one of my female coworkers comes in dressed more like she’s heading out for a Saturday night barhop than a Tuesday morning meeting. Almost everyone, including our boss, has said something to her about how she is dressed, but it’s always in a kidding way. No one seems up to telling her how distracting her clothes (or lack of) are, especially to the guys, some of who joke about it behind her back.

How do we make her understand she isn’t doing anyone a favor coming to work dressed like that? --- NOT ENJOYING THE VIEW

DEAR NOT ENJOYING: You all, especially your boss, need to keep in mind that the image this young woman projects is not only distracting to her coworkers and making her the butt of jokes, but if your business has contact with the public, how she appears to outsiders may have even bigger repercussions. And, that no one has yet spoken seriously to her about her style sense may read to her as permission to keep the clubbing look going.

It’s time a company dress code is put in writing and shared with all current and future employees, and that she is told directly by the boss ─ with no joking around ─ that she has to make some appropriate adjustments to her weekday wardrobe.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My wife and I haven’t had a vacation with just the two of us since before our twins were born four years ago.

Since my wife is currently home fulltime, for the last few years when my sister-in-law and her husband have gone on vacation they have left the kids with us. My sister-in-law has been offering for over a year now to watch our boys so my wife and I can get away, but my wife refuses to let her or anyone else do overnights with our kids.

This is not good for our marriage and I keep telling her that. What else can I do to wake her up to how much we need time for just the two of us? --- WANT TIME WITH MY WIFE

DEAR WANT TIME: It isn’t easy for some young mothers to take that first break from being Mommy, but it’s got to happen sooner or later.

Start small. Shoot for a long weekend or even just an overnight. Pick somewhere not too far from home, but far enough to give yourselves the simple luxury of being alone in the car for two or three uninterrupted hours. Follow it up with an adults-only meal in a grown-up type restaurant, and a whole night to spend as you used to before the kids came along.

Surviving a night or two away from your twins could help convince your wife that it’s okay to loosen the reins every now and then.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: “D” and I have been good friends since we were 11 years old. Last month she told me in an email that she has realized she is gay after meeting another woman she is strongly attracted to. I am happy she met someone special, especially since up until now not too many of her relationships ended well for her.

I am perfectly fine with her lifestyle choices, but it makes me wonder if she ever felt anything other than friendship for me and I feel a little awkward when we are hanging out together because that question is always in the back of my mind.

Do I say something to clear the air or just get over it and get on with our friendship like it used to be? --- TO ASK OR NOT TO ASK

DEAR TO ASK: Your friend was honest with you. You need to decide if you’re ready to be honest with her.

If you believe not knowing how she feels about you sexually will permanently affect your friendship, then you need to talk to her about it.

After you have her answer, if you still want her to be a part of your life, then you have to come to terms with what she tells you. It’s a friendship you’ve both invested a lot of time in, and old friends don’t grow on trees.