life

Changing Course

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | August 8th, 2018

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: After five semesters working toward a biology bachelor’s I’ve realized I am not cut out for the field. My grades are OK, but I just don’t see myself spending the next 20 or 30 years working in a field I do not enjoy. I haven’t told my parents yet that I want to change majors, or maybe take a semester off to figure things out. They have been helping me with expenses and I don’t know how to tell them I want to switch. Any advice? --- NEEDING TO CHANGE COURSE

DEAR NEEDING: Changing direction, especially after investing time and money – not all of it yours – isn’t generally easy, but it’s better to do it sooner rather than later. Be honest with your parents and let them know you feel it would be a waste to continue in a major that no longer feels right.

The option of taking some time off may be your best bet. You could use the break to earn some money, and perhaps chip away at some missing gen ed credits at a local community college as you explore your next steps.

life

Grandma Opts Out of Babysitting

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | August 7th, 2018

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My husband and I have a two-year old daughter and we just had a baby boy earlier this summer. My husband’s family lives two states away and my mom’s house is 20 minutes from mine. Whenever my in-laws visit they can’t wait to babysit so my husband and I can go out, but my own mother told me to find someone else because as she says, “I raised my own kids. I don’t need to raise yours.” Am I nuts in thinking I should be able to count on my own mother to watch her own grandkids once in a while? --- BAFFLED DAUGHTER

DEAR BAFFLED: While most grandparents, like your in-laws, jump at the chance to babysit their grandkids, this isn’t the first time I’ve heard about one who opts out of the babysitting part of grandparenthood. Their justification is they don’t want to get roped into giving up their own independence, and they feel it’s not their job to offer childcare services.

If you’ve already hashed it out with your mother and she isn’t budging, you’re better off not banging your head against the wall, but rather start developing alternate arrangements like a babysitting swap with friends, other trustworthy relatives, or a reliable neighborhood sitter.

life

A Delicate Question

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | August 3rd, 2018

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Sometimes I work the box office during my shift at a multiplex. We give discounts to seniors and it is usually obvious who gets the discount, but sometimes I get a ticket buyer who looks like maybe they’re old enough, but I can’t tell for sure. I do not want to make someone feel bad about looking older than they are, but I also figure most people want to save money. Is there a good way to ask someone’s age without offending them? --- NOT SURE HOW TO ASK

DEAR NOT SURE: Why ask? If the ticket pricing policy is posted, let the buyer decide. If they order a senior ticket, let them have it. If they don’t, let them pay full price. Even if they qualify for the discount, it may be more important to them to be taken for younger than they are, and I see no harm in that.

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