DEAR NATALIE: I'm about to get married, and my family is at each other's throats over the guest list. I wanted a small wedding, around 100 people. My fiance's parents -- who are paying for the bulk of the wedding -- wanted a bigger crowd, about 300. We both come from large families (I'm Italian, he's Greek), but I wanted to keep it small to keep down costs and because I'm not close to many people in my extended family. So, I explained this to my soon-to-be mother-in-law, and now she's angry. 

The wedding is only six months away, and invitations should have been sent by now. I'm a ball of stress and not sure how to handle this. Any suggestions? -- BRIDAL BLOWUP

DEAR BRIDAL BLOWUP: Elope! Run, grab a ladder (and your groom) and head for the hills! No? Can't do? OK, how about plan B: compromise. Swallow your pride, call your mother-in-law and say to her that there has to be some sort of middle ground where you both can feel comfortable. 

Unfortunately, because she is paying for the bulk of this, she probably feels insulted and assumes she can invite whomever she wants to the wedding. Not a good look, but true to a certain extent. Would you be comfortable with about 150-200 guests? 

You may just have to look at the bigger picture. You are going to be in her life for a long time, and if you want harmony, start now. It's frustrating, but let's be real -- Weddings are hardly ever about the two people getting married. They often are about all the family around them. The sooner you recognize that this is just a day, the easier it can be to put in perspective and move forward. As long as she is willing to pay for the other guests, the bigger budget for food, drink, linens, rentals, party favors, etc., then why fight so hard? If you really want a small wedding, find a way to pay for it yourself. Otherwise, jump on the bandwagon and try to make it as fun as you can. 

And order the good champagne! 

Natalie's Networking Tip of the Week: Want to meet new people in the city without having to spend any money? Share your time and join a volunteer organization that focuses on something you believe in. It's a great way to network while building self-esteem and doing something good for your community. 

Please send your relationship and lifestyle questions to nbencivenga@post-gazette.com or tweet them to @NBSeen. You can also send postal letters to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Drive, Pittsburgh, PA 15212

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)

DEAR NATALIE: With all of the new ride-hailing services popping up, I was wondering what the proper protocol is for tipping? Should you tip your driver? What if you take a black car service? Sometimes I tip, sometimes I don't, and it always feels awkward either way. What are your thoughts? -- NEEDS A TIP ON TIPPING

DEAR NEEDS A TIP ON TIPPING: When in doubt, tip. It is always nice to give someone a few extra dollars if you have it and can spare it. I always tip 15-20 percent -- unless the service or situation is completely awful, which is extremely rare. When it comes to taking a black car service, tipping is definitely encouraged because those drivers make a significantly smaller percentage per ride than Lyft or Uber drivers. Cash is king in all instances, and if you know you are going out for the night, make sure you swing by an ATM (or pull out that shoe box under your bed with your secret "fun money" cash stash) and share the wealth. Showing a little appreciation by giving someone a few extra dollars can really brighten their day (and put a little positive karmic cash in your jar as well). 

Natalie's Networking Tip of the Week: Speaking of politics, don't bring that subject up at a networking event. People have crashed and burned when trying to make a positive impression on someone because they misread the situation. Remember why you are there and network with positive topics and thoughtful conversations about issues that relate to bettering your future. 

Please send your relationship and lifestyle questions to nbencivenga@post-gazette.com or tweet them to @NBSeen. You can also send postal letters to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Drive, Pittsburgh, PA 15212

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)

DEAR NATALIE: My husband has been hiding my birth control pills, claiming that he wants to have a baby right now. I keep telling him that I am not ready for children and to stop taking my medication. The other day, I found them in the garbage can. Two months ago, I caught him emptying the pack in the toilet. When I confronted him, he blamed me for not giving him what he wants. I literally do not know what to do. I know he wants to start a family, but this is really upsetting me. What should I do? -- UPSET WIFE

DEAR UPSET WIFE: This is really creepy, controlling behavior. Just so you know, this is not normal. This is a form of abuse.  The fact that he’s trying to control your body in such an intimate way makes me wonder what else may be going on in the home. When you mentioned how he was emotionally manipulating you and basically taking what he wants whether or not you want to give it to him is disturbing. Does he contact you throughout the day, demanding to know where you are? Does he obsess over your whereabouts or who you are with? Is he disruptive to other parts of your life? Is he causing you emotional or physical pain? Does he control the money? Take a moment to reflect on your day-to-day interactions with him and see if this behavior is limited to this particular space or if you are now seeing it in other parts of your relationship. Regardless, trying to control your reproductive health is not only harmful to your physical body, but to your emotional and mental state, as well. He does not have the right to do this. Having a family is a decision that you make as a family, and everyone needs to be on the same page. I cannot tell you what to do, but I would recommend that you seek out therapy to find some support. Having a child with someone who is already this controlling concerns me. In the meantime, keep your medication with you so that he doesn’t have access to it. But please find someone to support you. This isn’t your fault and you deserve to have your bodily autonomy respected.  

DEAR NATALIE: My boyfriend is struggling. His dad just passed away very suddenly and I am not sure what to do or say to make him feel better. He is really down and with his dad’s birthday coming up in the next few weeks, his depression has gotten worse. Whenever I try to talk to him, he just says there is nothing anyone can do to fix it. But, there has to be some way I can help him.  They were so close and I know this is really hard on him, as it was an unexpected death. Any thoughts on how to help him heal? --AT A LOSS

DEAR AT A LOSS: Grief is a complicated emotion and processing a sudden death can take time. Your boyfriend is most likely still in shock over the sudden loss of his dad. There really isn’t any way to cheer him up right now, and those efforts may make him feel worse. Instead, just be with him. Let him mourn in his own way and own time. There are stages to grieving. It sounds like his shock is the first stage, which is denial. It can be hard to accept when someone is gone, like you are caught in a bad dream that you can’t wake up from. He may become angry, which is also a normal part of the grieving process, as is his feeling of depression. What you need to look for is if things don’t slowly progress. If he is stuck in a state for many months or if he begins saying things that concern you, then you might want to encourage him join either a support group or attend therapy that is geared towards working through grief. His life was forever changed by this moment, so be gentle with him. But, remember that it isn’t your job to fix him, only to love him.

Natalie's Networking Tip of the Week: Afraid to start a conversation at an event? Begin with an easy question: “What brings you out tonight?” Maybe you will get a gruff answer from someone not in the mood, but maybe you’ll get a smile and friendly response from someone that opens up the door for a more meaningful interaction. Either way, it’s just good to practice!

Please send your questions to Natalie Bencivenga to her email, nbencivenga@post-gazette.com; or through postal mail to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Dr., Pittsburgh, PA 15212. Follow her on Twitter at @NBSeen and on Instagram @NatalieBenci

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)