DEAR NATALIE: I believe that I was roofied by my grown stepchildren many years ago. I know that sounds crazy, but I was told by a physician that I had been drugged. I didn’t know what that even meant at the time. I lived in shame over my behavior that I couldn’t remember, and was very careful around my partner’s children after that point. I spent a lot of time in denial, thinking that his adult children would do something like this to me, but they have never accepted our marriage. I think they thought if I behaved like a drunk or a fool, he would leave me, which of course never happened. I don’t trust them at all, especially with my son. I never filed charges because years had passed before I really understood what had been done to me and had the chance to work out my emotions. My husband is older and I’m sure when he dies his kids will sue me over our substantial estate. Yes, we have all the necessary legal documents in place, and let me add that we’ve been married for more than 30 years. My issue really comes back to the fact that I could have been seriously harmed the night that his kids drugged me and I do not want them in my life, or my son’s life, after he dies. There are too many hard feelings and I feel the relationship with his children is far beyond repair. Do you think it is fair or okay to cut people out of your life when you have known them for this long? --FORGET YOU KNOW ME

DEAR FORGET YOU KNOW ME: First of all, I hope you understand that what transpired was criminal behavior. It was disgusting, illegal and immoral. I would be horrified if this happened to me and I can understand your fears of having your son around these people. Cut the cancer out of your life. These are toxic people who wish you harm and you do not need that. I can understand that this may put your husband in a difficult position. Does he know what happened all those years ago? What would his reaction be if he did? Money is also a big factor in all of this, as this “substantial estate” is clearly at the core of why your stepchildren behaved in the way that they did. Greed can make people do sick things. While we can’t turn back the hands of time, we can decide how to move forward. Do so with dignity and respect for yourself and your son by distancing yourself from the madness. You don’t have to put up with abuse, period.

DEAR NATALIE: What is the best way to greet people, anymore? No matter what I do, I feel like it is wrong. For instance, at work the other day, I walked by a colleague and said, “Hi, how are you?” They replied, “I’m terrible.” That’s not the sort of normal response you get when you ask someone that question, so I was taken by surprise. By the time I could respond, they were already gone. Is there a better way to engage with people at work? --WRONG QUESTION

DEAR WRONG QUESTION: If you are going to ask someone a question, be prepared for any answer. While some would say “how are you” is the same as “hello,” it isn’t. Whoever this was must have been having a pretty terrible morning to blurt that out to you in passing. I can understand your trepidation moving forward, but don’t give up social niceties all together. We have all become so insular and isolated from one another that a friendly hello can become misconstrued. But, I truly believe that we all need each other and it all starts with a first step. Humans are social creatures. Don’t allow this one experience to dictate how you relate to others moving forward. And in the meantime, if you see that person again that said they were having a terrible day, follow up. Let them know that you are thinking of them and hoping that they are OK. We all need a little compassion.

Please send your questions to Natalie Bencivenga to her email, nbencivenga@post-gazette.com; or through postal mail to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Dr., Pittsburgh, PA 15212.

Natalie's Networking Tip of the Week: Don’t be afraid to invest real time into creating meaningful relationships. Networking breaks the ice, but it’s up to you to take those introductions and translate them into mutually beneficial relationships.

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)

DEAR NATALIE: So, I met this guy on Plenty of Fish [the dating app]. And we've been communicating about a future date at a local restaurant. However, I sent a message out to confirm this to his account on the site several times (as I do not have his cell number), and he has yet to respond. Should I go ahead anyway and wait for him at the restaurant, or do you think he is flaking out on me and I should just bail? -- DATE DRAMA

DEAR DATE DRAMA: Sounds like you are less than enthused about this date. If you have reached out multiple times and have heard nothing, I would try him one more time and see if he responds. But, if he doesn't contact you, don't go and sit and wait for him. Who has time for that? Instead, contact your friends and see if they want to meet up for drinks, or to do something fun after work such as a bike ride along the city's trails or a rooftop yoga class. Use this as an opportunity to take yourself out on a date and do something just for you. (And if that means putting on sweatpants and binge-watching "Stranger Things" on Netflix, who am I to judge?) At the end of the day, if someone is interested, he makes it known. If he's blowing you off this early in the game, why would you want to entertain this further? Next!

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)

Please send your relationship and lifestyle questions to nbencivenga@post-gazette.com or tweet them to @NBSeen. You can also send postal letters to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Drive, Pittsburgh, PA 15212

DEAR NATALIE: I have a dilemma with my boyfriend. He is a great guy but just really unreliable. We will make plans, and he will show up 20 to 30 minutes late and not even apologize. He is perpetually late for family dinners, work events, etc. We have been together almost a year, and while the time we have together is wonderful, it's frustrating that he acts as though my time isn't valuable. I'm not sure how to address this situation without upsetting him. We never fight and I don't want to start rocking the boat. -- TIRED OF WAITING

DEAR TIRED OF WAITING: News flash: If you don't "fight" once in a while, it's probably not a really great relationship. We grow closer to each other by working through differences and sorting out solutions to problems. If you never have worked through anything, your relationship is probably pretty superficial -- especially after a year. 

The fact that he doesn't seem to care about your time indicates maybe he doesn't respect you. It's really easy to pick up a cell phone and text, "Hey, running late, be there in 15, sorry! XO." I typed that in 15 seconds. If he doesn't think you are worth 15 seconds, of course he doesn't care about leaving you hanging for more than 15 minutes. Sit down with him and tell him this bothers you. Rock that boat. Make some waves and figure out how to solve this problem. Some people are perpetually late. If that's not a deal breaker, cool. But perpetually rude? Now that's game over. 

Please send your relationship and lifestyle questions to nbencivenga@post-gazette.com or tweet them to @NBSeen. You can also send postal letters to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Drive, Pittsburgh, PA 15212

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)