DEAR NATALIE: Every time my best friend gets into a new relationship (which is often) she seems to ‘morph’ into whatever her new boyfriend wants her to be. The last guy was a musician, so she was obsessed with his music (which was bad) for five weeks. The guy before that was a deeply devout Christian, so for six months I had to listen to her reciting Bible quotes. The one before that was a sports fanatic and my friend (who had never watched football in her life) became a die-hard Steelers fan for about two months. What gives? I find it all very annoying!

--CHAMELEON LIFE

DEAR CHAMELEON LIFE: Your friend sounds immature and still figuring out who she is. While it is natural to pick up traits of someone when you are dating them or be open to new things, it can be really weird to see a friend morph into her boyfriend--especially when you’ve seen it over and over again. But in all honesty, what can you do? She clearly has some insecurity issues and a need to please. I actually feel bad for your friend. Instead of being annoyed, try imagining what it would be like to be that insecure and needy. Now I want you to keep that in mind the next time you want to roll your eyes at her. Hopefully this is a phase and she will grow out of it as she becomes more comfortable with herself. In the meantime, continue to build her up and express what a great person she is just as she is. After all, that’s what friends are for.

DEAR NATALIE: My fiance and I have just moved in together and we were wondering if we should combine our incomes into one checking account or keep separate accounts? I say we should keep separate accounts, but he thinks we should combine them. Who’s right? --BANK ON IT

DEAR BANK ON IT: I guess this just depends on who you ask. Some of my friends keep everything in one account and refer to their money as “ours.” Some of my friends keep separate accounts and split up the household expenses that way. Others do a mix of both separate and joint finances. Personally, I think it is important to maintain a sense of financial independence even within your relationship. Often times, whoever controls the money has the power. In order to keep a sense of power for yourself, I suggest always having a separate account that is really an “emergency” fund in case things go south and you need to get out. Some would say that’s paranoid, but I’ve watched enough people go through really dark relationships and have no financial leg to stand on. At the same time, if you are comfortable with it, it may be a good idea to also have a joint account that you both put money into every month to cover your joint expenses, like food, meals out together, rent or your mortgage, utility bills, etc.

Natalie's Networking Tip of the Week: Have fun with networking! Don’t be afraid to set up your own small event and invite your friends, asking them each to also bring one friend. Before you know it, you will meet plenty of new people that each have a connection to someone you like and trust.

Please send your questions to Natalie Bencivenga to her email, nbencivenga@post-gazette.com; or through postal mail to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Dr., Pittsburgh, PA 15212. Follow her on Twitter at @NBSeen and on Instagram @NatalieBenci

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)

DEAR NATALIE: My boyfriend and I have been together for about two years. We decided to move in together almost a year ago, and since then, we have been arguing and not getting along at all. We broke up three weeks ago. The problem is we are stuck in this apartment with ONE bedroom for another two months until the lease is up. How do we deal? It's so awkward and uncomfortable. Plus, I think he wants to get back together, but I am just not feeling this anymore. Help! -- TOO CLOSE FOR COMFORT

DEAR TOO CLOSE FOR COMFORT: Yikes! If you are adamantly opposed to getting back together, I suggest you take turns sleeping on the couch or find a friend or family member who will let you crash one or two nights a week. 

I'm sorry that this has happened, but it has only been three weeks, so of course it will feel awkward and confusing. The fact that he wants to get back together certainly isn't helping the situation, and because rent is so expensive, you are kind of stuck until you can find a new roommate. That would be my other suggestion. Talk to him about both of you looking for other roommates. One could stay and take over the lease. 

With only two months left on your lease, you both should be looking for new places anyway. So make this your motivator to get out there and find somewhere new to live for a fresh start! And as an aside, be careful how quickly you move in with a lover in the future. Moving in together after only one year of dating may seem romantic, but it's important to think these things through. Next time, give yourself a little more time to learn about the other person before you jump.  

Natalie's Networking Tip of the Week: Don't be afraid to put out into the world what you want. Speak it, share it, explain your vision and goals to the people you are around. You never know what idea you could spark in someone else with your passion that could lead to something great for you both. 

Please send your relationship and lifestyle questions to nbencivenga@post-gazette.com or tweet them to @NBSeen. You can also send postal letters to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Drive, Pittsburgh, PA 15212

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)

DEAR NATALIE: My good friend has been in a long-term relationship for a while but can't seem to get over the ex. The ex is remarried and indulges my friend with heavy flirtation, which makes it worse. I don't know if they have "rekindled" anything, but my friend is distraught. He doesn't want to break up a happy home, but he can't seem to shake his ex. I keep telling him that this will only end badly for both of them, but he's like a moth to a flame. Any thoughts? -- GOING TO GET BURNED

DEAR GOING TO GET BURNED: If you believe in the possibility of past lives, maybe your friend was with this person as lovers in another time and place. Instead of respecting the rules and boundaries of this life, they are trying to re-create a place that will never be again. It's actually sad and poetic if you think of it that way, which can change the way you approach your friend's desire for this other person. Sometimes, dreams of the past and those rose-colored glasses can cloud a person's judgment and make them long for things that never were. The next time your friend brings up his ex, ask him why they didn't work out. Ask why they went in separate directions in the first place. Lust is a selfish feeling; love is selfless. If he really loves this person and doesn't want to cause harm, he has to let that person go and focus on the relationship in front of him. This person is remarried, and while they may think it is fun and sexy to flirt with their ex, it's harmful to everyone involved. Ask your friend, "How could you build anything solid with your ex knowing it was built on lies and betrayal?" 

Natalie's Networking Tip of the Week: Use those networking skills to organize some friends and colleagues to give back. Hurricane Harvey has left some major damage in its wake, so why not throw an impromptu charity potluck where donations are sent to the Red Cross? Feels good to do good!

Please send your relationship and lifestyle questions to nbencivenga@post-gazette.com or tweet them to @NBSeen. You can also send postal letters to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Drive, Pittsburgh, PA 15212

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)