DEAR NATALIE: Hi, I've been married for 27 years. When we met, it was love at first sight for the both of us. I was only her second boyfriend. We took our time and after six months, we began being intimate. We got married one and a half years later. After we got married, I was with her romantically only once or twice a year. For some years, it was ZERO times a year. I’m not the the type of man to sleep around but I’m a hot 52 year old Latino male. I get looks from a lot of women. I've always made any woman I've been with happy. That's not a problem. I've tried talking to my wife about this lack of romance. Her response is," I’m like my mother. We don't like sex." She knows that I’m unhappy and that I’m very sad that we don’t connect on that level. I have even asked her to see a doctor because it could be hormonal. But, it has fallen on deaf ears. I'm really lonely. I need affection. I'm the nurturer. I’m kind, gentle, I like to cook and clean, Sometimes I feel USED. I know she loves me but, this situation isn’t working. I feel so alone in my marriage. Any advice?

-- DESPERATELY SEEKING

DEAR DESPERATELY SEEKING: I applaud you for being loyal, for trying to talk to your wife about this and communicating your needs. But now it's a matter of what you can live with (or without). If you really can't imagine the rest of your life without sex (and I wouldn't blame you!), then you should consider a divorce. If she isn't interested in sex, and it sounds like it hasn't changed or gotten any better, I don't know what other option you have. Perhaps by saying those words out loud, it might make her recognize just how unhappy you are, and maybe she will be open to going to a sex therapist together. But, if she still doesn't get it or doesn't seem to care, then you should move on. Life is too short to be in a lonely marriage. Separate for a bit, give yourself the opportunity to see what else is out there, and then decide if your marriage is really over or worth saving.

DEAR NATALIE: I’m in a weird situation. My friend Mike has a wonderful boyfriend named Steven. They have been together for five years. Steven is super sweet and really handsome. But, Mike doesn’t seem to appreciate him and is always cheating on him whenever Steven goes away on business trips or working late. Mike says that this is no big deal and that Steven doesn’t care, but Steven doesn’t know what Mike is doing. So, I told Steven what Mike was up to and they got into a huge fight. Now Mike is mad at ME for spilling the beans, and accused me of wanting Steven for myself. Steven wants to leave Mike, and Mike is devastated. Did I do something wrong here? Isn’t it better that Steven knows that truth? -- TATTLETALE

DEAR TATTLETALE: Well, you can kiss your friendship with Mike good-bye. Getting in the middle of someone else’s relationship is never a good idea because you don’t really ever know what is going on behind closed doors. Can you really blame Mike for being angry with you? Meddling to the extreme you did would make anyone mad. Regardless of what was going on in their relationship, it had nothing to do with you and now it is just a big mess. You also have to ask yourself if you did do this (even a tiny bit) out of the hopes that Steven might leave Mike for you. To be accused of that by Mike makes me wonder if there was another motive here, even if it was unconscious on your part. The fact that Steven didn’t even ask you if Mike was cheating and you just volunteered this information makes me question your altruism even more. But, whatever the case, the damage is done. If I were you, I would take a big step back from both of them until the smoke clears. They may work through this or it may be the end. But whatever the outcome, I think it’s time you take a seat. You’ve done enough. 

Natalie's Networking Tip of the Week: What are your goals for networking? Focus on your intention for attending a networking event so that you are making the most of your interactions.

Please send your questions to Natalie Bencivenga to her email, nbencivenga@post-gazette.com; or through postal mail to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Dr., Pittsburgh, PA 15212. Follow her on Twitter at @NBSeen and on Instagram @NatalieBenci

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)

DEAR NATALIE: I have a child on the autism spectrum. We do a lot of therapy during the week. My child was in the crowded waiting room waiting for his therapy sessions. He was sitting at a table by himself playing and was in his own happy little world when an older child came over and snatched the toy from him, almost hitting his face. My child was startled at first and then looked at the boy and was about to run and grab it back when I called out, "Don't grab the toy," worried that my child may push or hit him out of anger. Keep in mind this child also has delays. I waited for the child's parent to step in. 

After a minute, my child was starting to melt down. I called out to the waiting room for this child's parent (as I felt it would be inappropriate to directly speak to the boy as I didn't know how he would react). No adult responded. I finally said to the boy, "It wasn't nice to grab the toy. Can he please have it back?" I then redirected the child to a toy next to him and said, "That's a neat toy, would you like to play with this one instead?" Then the boy's mother came over and snatched the toy from her son and firmly put it on the table in front of my child and said, "Don't talk to my son that way." My child started to cry. 

I will be seeing her every week since we are scheduled at the same times. I feel like I want to explain what happened. Any advice as to how to do this? -- MAMA BEAR

DEAR MAMA BEAR: Sometimes it's the parents who need therapy more than the kids. Not everyone is equipped to handle a child with special needs, especially when those needs are constant. The mother who snapped at you probably experiences intense challenges with her son and other aspects of her life and doesn't have the patience and coping skills that you do.

Someone very wise once told me, "Sure, Natalie, it's hard to be around that person, but can you imagine being that person?" A little compassion can go a long way. The next time you see her, walk up to her and say, "I'm sorry we got off on the wrong foot. My name is .... If you ever want to exchange ideas while we are sitting here about how to juggle this whole 'mom' thing, I would love to chat." Say it with a smile. She will either be caught off guard and react positively (because you put her at ease and asked for her suggestions) or she will stare at you blankly and not react. Either way, you took the high road.

Please send your relationship and lifestyle questions to nbencivenga@post-gazette.com or tweet them to @NBSeen. You can also send postal letters to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Drive, Pittsburgh, PA 15212

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)

DEAR NATALIE: My best girlfriend and I have been working together for a few months now. Her boyfriend (who is my boyfriend's older brother) has a lot of money. He was a successful tech entrepreneur and now wants to invest in something. He wants to buy the Pilates studio that I manage. This is causing a lot of anxiety for me. This is my space, and I don't want them to walk all over me or belittle what I do. I also find myself frustrated with my friend. She is really flighty, and I think she is just using him for the money. What do I do? I feel really caught in the middle of the whole situation. Any advice would be helpful. -- STUCK IN THE MIDDLE

DEAR STUCK IN THE MIDDLE: It sounds like there are a couple of issues at work here. Is it possible that you could be jealous of your friend? Maybe because her boyfriend has some money, or maybe because he's now able to do something that you would like to do - i.e., invest in a studio? Think about who and what you are really upset about. Stop worrying about her. Who cares if she is dating him for the money? You have a boyfriend, you have a job you seem to love - focus on yourself. As for what he is trying to do with the studio, I wouldn't get too worked up about this, yet. Wait and see if he actually takes the steps to invest. He could just be trying to impress the girlfriend. If he does seem to move forward with plans, you could always sit down with him and the current owner(s) and talk about the issues and goals of the studio moving forward. By being proactive instead of reactive, you will empower yourself and feel less anxious about the situation. 

Natalie's Networking Tip of the Week: Practice networking every day. Even if you just say hello to someone in the grocery store or stop for a minute to chat with a colleague at the office watercooler, the more you work on being assertive and friendly, the easier it will get. One contact a day. Make it a goal! 

Please send your relationship and lifestyle questions to nbencivenga@post-gazette.com or tweet them to @NBSeen. You can also send postal letters to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Drive, Pittsburgh, PA 15212

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)