DEAR NATALIE: I recently got engaged to a girl that I have been dating for only 6 months. I felt a lot of pressure from my family and her family to propose. She is already dress shopping and wants to pick a venue this week. However, I am really mad at myself for proposing and wishing I could take it back. How do I back out of this before things get out of control? I know she isn’t “the one”. I should have broken it off before it got this far. --BAD DECISION

DEAR BAD DECISION: You have no choice except to tell her the truth. She’s going to be upset, naturally, but better to tell her now then down the road after the venue is booked, dress paid for and honeymoon planned. You also need to take a look in the mirror and think about why you were so easily pushed into doing this. Take some time to date yourself for a while. Find out who you are, and who you want to be. Stand in your own convictions or I’m afraid you are going to a live a “yes man” kind of existence that won’t make you happy or fulfilled. Getting married is one of the most important decisions of your life and you were steamrolled by pushy people. Work on standing up for yourself. When the right woman comes along, you won’t need badgered into this experience, you will want to go through this journey together. Until then, it’s time to own your mistake and move forward separately.

DEAR NATALIE: My wife insists that I spend a lot of time with her family, but we have been married for seven months now and she still won’t hang out with my family. My sister is really hurt by this and told me I need to talk to my wife. What should I do? --MAN IN THE MIDDLE

DEAR CAN'T WIN: I don’t think it is very fair that your wife gets to have her way all the time. Marriage is all about compromise, and while life is never 50/50 (sometimes, 80/20 depending on the day of the week) the pendulum needs to swing in your direction once in a while in order for things to stay somewhat equal. The next time she wants you to hang out with her family, I would say something like, “That would be fun! I’ll invite my sister and see if she wants to join us.” If she balks at this, say, “Well then next weekend let’s all do something together. I’ll see if my parents can come, too.” If she refuses still, you need to find out what the problem really is. Did someone upset her? Does she think that they don’t like her? Is she intimidated by them? Whatever the reason is, get to the bottom of it now and nip this nonsense in the bud. Family is family and she shouldn’t expect you to drop everything for hers but be able to ignore yours. Not cool.

Natalie's Networking Tip of the Week: Try not to eat food at cocktail parties while you are trying to meet and interact with people. While it is great that there is a lot of food at these events to nibble on, no one wants to talk to people with garlic breath or with spinach wedged in their tooth. Save the snacking for after the networking!

(Have a question for Natalie? Please send your questions to Natalie Bencivenga to her email, nbencivenga@post-gazette.com; or through postal mail to 358 North Shore Drive Pittsburgh, PA 15212.)

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)

DEAR NATALIE: I am invited to the wedding of a close friend. The guest list also includes a man with whom I had a serious fling of sorts. I'm worried about being seated at the same table as him. I'm concerned because we have not spoken in quite awhile. The last time we did speak, things did not go very well. I want to say I would be on my best behavior, but I'm not sure I can make that promise. And I'm not sure he could, either. The bride and groom are aware of the situation. I hate to back out of going, but I would really hate to ruin anybody's celebration with our bad blood. Any advice? -- No Promises

DEAR NO PROMISES: While I don't know exactly what happened between the two of you, it sounds as though neither of you have really let "it" go. You have three options: 1. Don't go to the wedding and resign yourself to letting your emotions control your life and decisions you make. 2. Go to the wedding and keep your distance from him. I doubt that the bride and groom would seat you near each other with such bad blood. This may be something you talk to the bride about, and it sounds as though you are close enough to do so. Request sitting as far from him as possible and do not engage him. 3. Contact him before the event and try to resolve this. I don't mean you have to be friendly but make a pact not to engage with one another so as not to disrupt an otherwise wonderful event. 

I would go with No. 2 and have a good look in the mirror before leaving for the party. Who is in control here? If you are in control of your own life, that means taking ownership of your feelings, acknowledging them ... and then let them pass over you. Realize that after this night, you never have to look at him again. So brush him off and have some fun. (Also, don't drink too much ... emotions take over when the champagne starts flowing!) 

Natalie's Networking Tip of the Week: What are your arms doing while you are talking to someone? If your arms are folded, they may be signaling that you are feeling defensive or bored. If you are playing with your hair or picking your nails, it may come off as anxious or flighty. Try keeping them tucked behind you while you listen, which shows interest and engagement.

Please send your relationship and lifestyle questions to nbencivenga@post-gazette.com or tweet them to @NBSeen. You can also send postal letters to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Drive, Pittsburgh, PA 15212

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)

DEAR NATALIE: While at a party recently, I had an acquaintance say to me: "My ... you are getting really chunky. I hope it's just the baby!" Really??? How would you react if someone said this to you while six months pregnant? I was astounded and taken aback. What should I have said? -- Mommy To Be

DEAR MOMMY TO BE: In my fantasy life I would want to say something like, "I'm eating for two ... what's your excuse?" But, in reality, we all know that taking the high road is the better decision. Ha, who am I kidding? I would totally have called this person out on being a rude, thoughtless jerk. I would have retorted: "You are yet another example of how women's bodies are policed in our culture and in every situation. I'm literally creating a life, which is the most important job on this planet and is too often degraded and diminished by thoughtless and insensitive comments from people like you. Now would you please excuse me, I have a gallon of ice cream to eat." #Next. 

Please send your relationship and lifestyle questions to nbencivenga@post-gazette.com or tweet them to @NBSeen. You can also send postal letters to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Drive, Pittsburgh, PA 15212

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)