Stacy Berman has sold homes for nearly two decades, and numerous times each year, she helps clients move through heart-wrenching transitions to let go of a beloved property.

One recent case involved an accountant in her 40s who’d long resided in a small bungalow with her professor husband, two school-age daughters and her elderly mother. In the wake of the grandmother’s death from cancer, the family, who’d outgrown their small abode, realized it was time to upsize their living quarters.

But the accountant found it terribly difficult to let go of the bungalow. Why? Because she had such happy memories of living there during her mother’s healthier years.

“Irrationally, she feared that the happy memories of her mother would be gone forever after the bungalow was sold,” Berman says.

While it’s relatively rare for people of middle age to experience despair upon the sale of a property, it’s common for senior citizens to go through a rough housing transition when they downsize. That’s especially true for those who’ve lived in a family home for decades and raised their children there. For them, downsizing often feels like the end of their vital years and independence.

Even so, there can be significant advantages for older homeowners to step down to a smaller place, especially if this liberates them from arduous and expensive home upkeep requirements and lets them extract equity at a favorable time for the real estate market.

Here are a few pointers for sellers:

-- Launch a broad search for your next home before selling.

With more than 20 years of experience selling real estate behind her, Ashley Richardson, of the Long & Foster realty firm, has gained a key insight into the emotional bond that many people have to a longtime residence. She says it’s often possible to transfer this attachment to another home.

Consequently, she recommends that sentimental sellers start looking for their next residence as soon as they put their property on the market or even earlier.

“This way, you’ll more quickly detach from the house where you’ve been living for a long time,” says Richardson, who’s affiliated with the Residential Real Estate Council (crs.com). However, she urges those making a housing transition to restrict their property search solely to neighborhoods with homes they can afford, so as not to set themselves up for disappointment later.

-- Confirm your housing plans with your grown children.

Mark Nash, a real estate analyst and author of “1001 Tips for Buying and Selling a Home,” says many empty-nesters fear that letting go of a long-held property will mean fewer visits from family members. Yet lots of would-be sellers are also anxious to liberate themselves from the carrying costs a large property requires.

To address their fears of fewer family visits after downsizing, Nash says it can be wise for sellers to discuss these anxieties with their offspring. Perhaps future multi-generational family visits could be centered in a resort area where all could spend quality time together.

-- Depersonalize your property by removing memorabilia.

To break the emotional ties to their property, it helps many people to sort through and remove sentimental items. Nash says you’ll want to cull through your family memorabilia, eliminating all but the most precious of items.

“I can’t tell you how many people save their kids’ cribs in hopes that one day they’ll be used by their grandchildren or great-grandchildren. But those old cribs probably don’t even meet today’s standards for child safety,” Nash says.

Nash suggests you also give away or pack away many other family-related items, including toys and children’s books. And he recommends you remove family photographs from your walls.

“While you’re at it, you’ll need to paint the interior walls of your house. Be sure to repaint that purple room where your son lived as a teenager in a nice neutral tone, and cover over those pencil marks you made on the wall as your children grew up,” he says.

Neutralizing your property will not only help you detach from the place emotionally. It will also make it easier for you and your listing agent to attract buyers.

“People aren’t going to pay more because your house is filled with memories. In fact, having lots of memorabilia on display will only slow the sale of your property, because it keeps people from picturing themselves living there,” Nash says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

For young homebuyers from the millennial generation, choosing between an urban and a suburban lifestyle is often an excruciatingly difficult decision, says real estate analyst Christopher Leinberger.

A professor at George Washington University’s Center for Real Estate and Urban Analysis, Leinberger allows that the suburban lifestyle still offers many advantages for young buyers, especially those with small children.

In the burbs, it’s typically easier to afford a large house and a substantial yard, with access to quality schools and other amenities.

In contrast, urban living -- based more on an older, European city-centered model -- appeals to many millennials as a stimulating, walkable and community-friendly lifestyle.

Leinberger says that homes in walkable town and city centers will gain and hold value more strongly than will those in outlying suburban enclaves.

“There is substantial pent-up market demand for walkable urban development. Our research shows it will take 20 to 30 years to satisfy this demand,” he says.

Although many millennials grew up in suburban settings where the car was king, an increasing number don’t prefer the lifestyle their parents pursued, says Mark Nash, a longtime real estate broker based in Illinois.

“For young buyers, the struggle between city and suburb comes down to this: Which of the two options has the most pros and the fewest cons? This is a personal choice no one can make for you,” says Nash, the author of "1001 Tips for Buying and Selling a Home."

Here are a few pointers for young buyers:

-- Take the decision-making process seriously.

If you grew up in the suburbs, you may be programmed to think that’s the best habitat. Likely your parents aimed for a suburban abode as soon as they could afford their initial home.

But much has changed since your parents first went house shopping. Among other factors, many downtown neighborhoods have been revitalized in recent years, making them more appealing.

“The access and amenities of city living can outweigh the smaller size of the home you can afford there. Anyway, a suburban house doesn’t have the same status it did before,” says Ray Brown, co-author of “Home Buying for Dummies.”

Keep in mind, however, that the urban life is not for everyone.

“But others would find the noise and congestion exceedingly upsetting, not to mention the trash that can accumulate on the streets. They want a suburban setting, where life is calmer yet they can blast their stereo without neighbors’ complaints,” Nash says.

-- Consider the implications of commuting from your city abode.

How will your housing choice affect your daily commute?

“Living downtown could be wonderful -- a huge time saver -- if you also work downtown. Maybe you can walk to work or take a short trip by light rail or subway. Possibly, you could save an hour or two each day, time that could go to better purposes. Then, too, there’s the saving on gas,” Nash says.

But suppose you work in the suburbs and are counting on easy sailing to work from your downtown place due to a “reverse commute.” If so, make sure you test-drive your route to ensure that congestion won’t pose a major problem. Because many employment centers are now suburban, you might be surprised how many downtown residents head out of the city each morning.

-- Factor in downtown parking in light of your social life.

Most potential buyers of downtown properties ask about the availability of parking within or around any area they’re considering. And for most people, one or two spaces for their own cars seems like enough. But will your friends and family members have easy access to on-street or off-street parking? This question could be important to your social life.

“If people have to walk more than 10 minutes from where they park, you’re dead in the water socially, unless most of your friends also live downtown and can walk over,” Nash says.

-- Try to buy with your future plans in mind.

“Once people reach a certain age, usually by their mid-30s, they start falling like flies to family life,” Nash says.

If you plan to have your first child in the next few years, he urges you to consider making your initial purchase a suburban house rather than a small city place.

“You’ll save lots of time, energy and money if you skip the downtown stage and go straight to the suburban house. It’s one move instead of two,” Nash says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

After chemotherapy and radiation for her breast cancer, a magazine designer in her 50s needed an emotional pick-me-up. Fulfilling a long-standing dream, she settled on a cosmetic makeover for her historic Baltimore townhouse, including a minor kitchen remodeling plan.

The makeover did indeed cheer the magazine designer, who achieved a full recovery from her cancer. Three years later, the moderately priced renovation also paid off financially for the woman, who put her place up for sale to take a new job in Connecticut. The well-chosen interior upgrades, including freshly painted rooms and new kitchen appliances, led to strong multiple offers and a prompt closing.

Ashley Richardson, a Maryland real estate agent who sells property through the Long & Foster realty firm, doesn’t know the woman in this true story. But she applauds her for doing her interior improvements. That way, she could enjoy the pleasures of living with the upgrades before she moved.

“So often, sellers regret they didn’t get the chance to benefit from improvements they paid for,” says Richardson, who’s affiliated with the Residential Real Estate Council (crs.com).

But Sid Davis, a Utah-based real estate broker, cautions homeowners against excessive spending on upgrades.

“You’ll never recoup your money if you make your house a lot ritzier than your neighbors’ properties. For instance, you don’t want to pay for high-end quartz kitchen countertops if you’re living in the land of laminate,” says Davis, author of “A Survival Guide to Selling a Home.”

Here are a few other pointers for sellers:

-- Attempt to determine your home-selling timeline in advance.

Many sellers want to close a deal quite quickly. Perhaps they’re facing a serious health issue that requires a move to assisted living. Or maybe a divorce court is demanding they liquidate. Yet other sellers are unsure on timing.

Those in a quandary on their selling plans should try to crystallize their thinking -- with pen and paper -- before embarking on a redo of their property.

“Suppose you know you’ll retire eventually and let go of your house. If you clarify your plans and decide it will be six years before you move, you’ll want to prioritize the improvements you’d most enjoy in the meantime, like better kitchen countertops,” Davis says.

-- Don’t hesitate to consult real estate pros well in advance of a move.

Suppose you intend to downsize and sell several years in the future. Is it too soon to ask real estate agents for their advice?

No, says Dorcas Helfant, a former president of the National Association of Realtors (realtor.org).

“The best real estate agents aren’t looking for quick sales. They get most of their business through referrals and know that relationships with clients develop over time,” says Helfant, a broker who co-owns several Coldwell Banker real estate offices in Virginia.

She suggests you invite one or more agents over to evaluate your property, helping you create a checklist of superficial changes that could make your place a lot more appealing.

Cosmetic improvements, like painting or carpet replacement, are nearly always well worth the cost. Still, Helfant says you may need guidance in other areas, such as whether you should replace kitchen appliances with professional-grade ones.

-- Select home improvement contractors with great care.

For any given job, homeowners typically ask for three bids on the work and then pick the company charging least. But Davis questions this approach, noting that “short bidders,” who come in well under their competitors, often perform poorly, or will tack on extra charges at the end.

“Ironically, the company with the highest bid could also prove problematic. Maybe this firm is now too busy to take your job and is using a high bid to turn you down without creating ill will in the process,” Davis says.

Unless all three bidders are close in price, he says the middle one is generally your best choice.

-- Hire a home inspector to search for functional problems.

Most homeowners can readily identify minor items that need fixing around their place, such as a leaky faucet or a shaky stair railing. But what about hidden problems with plumbing, electrical, heating or cooling systems? And has the roof reached the end of its functional life?

These questions are best answered by a qualified home inspector. To avoid surprises later, Davis advocates that sellers arrange for a “pre-inspection” to get an early indication of hidden problems. He recommends you find an inspector in your area through a professional organization, such as the American Society of Home Inspectors (homeinspector.org).

The cost of an inspection can easily run to several hundred dollars, especially for a large home. But as Davis says, sellers who identify and resolve repair issues early often avoid expensive and time-consuming complications later. Your buyers are still entitled to hire their own inspector, yet many waive this right after reviewing the first inspector’s report, along with receipts showing all the home’s problems were rectified.

“Surprisingly, your inspectors’ report can be a powerful tool in marketing your property,” Davis says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)