A woman in her late 50s was extremely distraught after her husband left her on their 25th anniversary. In the wake of the breakup, she become sole owner of their handsome Tudor house in a posh Minneapolis suburb. But instead of holding onto the appreciating asset, she immediately sold it in "as is" condition for a sacrificial price -- a move she soon came to regret.

As this true story illustrates, making hasty financial decisions after a relationship breakup can be a poor idea. Whether a newly single mom like the Minneapolis homemaker should hang onto a property or sell depends on many factors. But financial advisers urge those in her position to wait for emotional calm before making any major move.

"There are many moving parts to this decision, so definitely take it seriously," says Bojana Rovchanin, a chartered financial analyst who specializes in helping clients navigating through divorce.

Of course, not everyone who owns a home post-divorce can afford to take a lengthy time pondering the pros and cons of selling. For financial reasons they must liquidate promptly. But those with options are well advised to reason their way through this complex matter and spend at least one year charting their best course of action.

Connie Cusick, a life coach and small business consultant, says many newly divorced women choose to hold onto the big family house because it feels safe. Yet ultimately, moving helps them redefine and expand their lives in positive ways.

After selling the family home, Cusick says many women of middle age feel liberated to explore interests that have been dormant for years.

Mark Nash, a longtime real estate broker and author of "1001 Tips for Buying and Selling a Home," tells the true story of his mother, a long-time homemaker who became single soon after all three of her children left home for college.

"Only after she sold our family's 2,200-square-foot house and bought another place half that size did she have the freedom to discover a lifestyle beyond her homemaker role. She became a competitive bridge player," Nash says.

Though selling the family home is the best choice for many single women who've become empty nesters, it's not the right plan for all.

"Occasionally, someone who sells and moves feels they've gone through a big psychological setback. They feel like they've lost their sense of place and never seem to recover from that loss," Nash says.

Here are a few pointers for newly single women debating whether to sell a family home:

-- First wrestle with the financial issues around your decision.

Nash recommends that anyone facing a major money decision such as whether to sell a house should consult a trusted financial planner or accountant before going forward.

"Everyone needs a reality check on their money. You need an impartial observer to help you make a careful assessment of your whole financial situation and analyze your alternatives," Nash says.

Before you visit your adviser's office, Nash encourages you to spend time with your checkbook and credit card statements to determine exactly how much your house is costing you.

"Many people greatly underestimate what they're spending on home upkeep, household services and furnishings," Nash says.

-- Look at the big picture before considering any major housing move.

Often, people see their real estate choices in isolation from the larger issues of their lives, says Michael Knight, a financial planner affiliated with the Garrett Planning Network. But he says all major financial decisions should be made with your lifestyle preferences in mind.

Assuming you're one of those fortunate enough to have financial options, to whom should you turn to help formulate your plans? Sometimes, a real estate agent who's willing to listen to your story, (and won't push you to sell), is a better adviser than a close friend or family member, Nash says.

"The people closest to you aren't always the most objective. If you don't feel comfortable talking to a real estate agent, consider talking through your personal plans with a therapist or life coach," he says.

-- Proceed gradually with your action plan.

Nash, like many veterans of the real estate business, knows it can be a mistake to hurry into a home sale soon after a life-changing event. For many women, this is an especially traumatic period if it occurs around the time when their children have left the nest for college or other endeavors.

"When the last child leaves home, some mothers go through a personal crisis that can cloud their judgment," Nash says.

He advises those going through any major life transition to wait as long as it takes to make a decision that they know they will be comfortable with.

"If time allows, delay any big housing move until your gut and pocketbook tell you the time is absolutely right," Nash says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

A retired couple in their late 60s owns a spacious red brick house in a coveted Washington, D.C., suburb where home values are still ascending. They love the walkable community -- close to shops, restaurants and, best of all, their grown daughter.

Sounds perfect, except for two factors: Upkeep on the big brick house has become arduous for the couple, and they no longer enjoy Washington winters. So they're now planning to sell the large place and downsize to two small condos -- one near their daughter's house and another in sunny Arizona.

Obviously, not all retirees can afford to swap one large house for two smaller ones. When they downsize, many must liquidate the family home just to support a basic lifestyle in a rental unit. But couples whose real estate has appreciated can now consider a two-home plan, says Margie Casey, a long-time real estate broker and the author of "Relocate at Retirement or Not?"

"A couple's primary place is usually near their base roots, ideally close to family and longtime friends," Casey says. "The second is often just a small condo or a detached 'villa' in a resort setting like the beach or mountains."

Years ago, ownership of two homes was solely for the wealthy. But now, more middle-class retirees are able to trade down from the big family house to two small domiciles in separate states.

One motivating factor for those downsizing to two smaller homes is the real estate recovery, which has raised property values in many communities.

"People are so happy that they can finally pull their equity out of that big house and move to wherever they want to live. Sometimes this involves two smaller places in different areas," Casey says.

Wherever they choose to live, most retirees want low maintenance, with exterior upkeep provided through a condo or homeowners' association.

Here are a few tips for retirees pondering a two-home plan:

-- Head to a financial planner before committing to any major move.

Casey says anyone considering two-home ownership should first discuss the financial implications with a professional adviser.

"It's a given you should talk to a financial planner who can crunch numbers and give you a second opinion," she says.

In theory, it should be no more expensive to own two small units than a big one worth twice the price. But in reality, dual homeownership can be more expensive, especially after taking into account homeowner's association fees and travel costs. Taxes are a key element as well.

"Once you investigate the taxes, you may decide to live one state away from your grandchildren, assuming that lowers your cost of living," Casey says.

-- Consider whether you'd like small-scale living in a condo.

Michael Crowley, a real estate broker and past president of the National Association of Exclusive Buyer Agents, says homebuyers contemplating the purchase of a condo should exercise caution.

"Going from a house to a condo is a big change. It's just personal taste, but some people never adjust well to condo living," he says. Those considering a dual-home retirement plan should be doubly cautious about condo purchases.

As he notes, there are other options for small-scale living that provide many of the worry-free features of a condo or apartment. For instance, in many "planned unit developments," you can buy a one-level detached unit that comes with exterior maintenance, including lawn service.

-- Factor in transportation access before deciding where to relocate.

Many a retiree has selected a retirement setting without taking into account airport access, which can be a major error.

"Try to live near an airport that's a hub for one of the major carriers. That can save you a ton on travel costs," Casey says.

Another transportation factor to consider is proximity to major roadways, including interstates.

-- Contain your expectations about visits from your offspring.

"Living near the grandkids is a top consideration for lots of retirees," Casey says, but she advises realism about how often you'll see family -- no matter how close they live.

"Your kids have busy lives, with dual careers and limited vacation time. Sure, you hope to see them often. But don't focus your whole retirement on this factor. What's equally important is to choose a lifestyle that works for you," Casey says.

-- Assess the benefits of two-home living.

One reason retirees like living in two places is to take advantage of two distinct climates, perhaps a warmer place from winter through spring and a cooler one the rest of the year.

By living in two places, many retirees have the best of both worlds. They can choose a primary setting near family and a secondary one to satisfy a quest for intellectual stimulation, perhaps in a college town where they can enjoy cultural events, lectures and classes.

Of course, not all retirees are suited to a two-home existence. Some prefer the serenity of a settled life with little travel involved. But others thrive on a dual-town living.

"The world is spinning faster and faster. While they still have time, retired people want an exciting life. There's no monotony when you live in two places," Casey says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

It's not only the U.S. population that's aging, it's also their houses. More than 40 percent of American homes are more than four decades old.

"A large portion of our housing stock was constructed during the '60s and '70s," says James W. Hughes, a professor and housing expert at Rutgers University.

Despite the current surge in renovation and reconstruction, many of the country's more than 100 million properties have a distinctly dated feel -- both on the exterior and the interior.

The problem for the sellers of these older homes is that facades and floor plans that once appealed to buyers are no longer in favor, particularly with the millennial generation.

"Flow is what it's all about for people in their 20s and 30s," says Tom Early, a veteran real estate broker and past president of the National Association of Exclusive Buyer Agents. "They like high ceilings and expansive floor plans. They hate the boxed-in feel that comes with low ceilings and a lot of small rooms."

For example, typical young buyers crave a large kitchen that opens onto an expansive "great room." They also look for a spacious master bedroom that connects to a well-appointed 'ensuite' bathroom.

Of course, when it comes to the tastes of millennial buyers, there are exceptions to the rule, says Sharon L. Ellsworth, a real estate broker and co-owner of a Re/Max Realty office.

"Some purchasers really appreciate the clean lines of mid-century contemporary houses," Ellsworth says.

But if you're seeking to sell a very ordinary and not-very-attractive house built decades ago, you'll need to factor its age into your decision on pricing, says Eric Tyson, co-author of "House Selling for Dummies."

Here are a few pointers for sellers:

-- Get a grasp on how your place looks to others.

Those seeking a candid assessment of their home's exterior appearance may wish to poll relatives, Ellsworth suggests.

"More than your friends, your relatives will give you their honest opinion. This can be helpful when you decide what price to ask," she says.

-- Highlight the positive in your marketing materials.

"Rarely does a house sell on advertising alone," Ellsworth says.

Even so, creating effective marketing materials can help draw people into a property they might otherwise be unwilling to visit due to its lack of street appeal.

"Pick out the two or three strengths of the house and be sure your agent highlights these in your marketing," says Tyson, the real estate author. "Maybe you have wonderful natural light, or a beautifully wooded backyard. Think back to the factors that drew you to the house when you first saw it," Tyson says.

If your house is located close to a highly rated public school or is set in a walkable urban area, those are also strong selling points.

-- Consider hiring a photographer.

More than ever, buyers are previewing properties online. It's not unusual for a listing agent to post between four and 10 photos of a house on the Internet.

Your agent may be skillful at taking photos with a cell phone. But if your home shows poorly from the street, Tyson says you could still do better with a professional photographer.

Your listing agent may ask you to cover the photographer's fees. Yet Tyson says the money could be well spent if it brings in prospects who might otherwise fail to visit the place.

-- Request that your listing agent conduct one or more "broker's opens."

Most people are familiar with public open houses, where anyone can show up. But Tyson says a more effective sales tool is a "broker's open," limited to real estate agents from the surrounding area.

"These kinds of open houses are incredibly important. That's because the vast majority of serious buyers still work with agents. If agents come through the house and like it, they're more likely to show it to their clients," Tyson says.

-- Add appeal to your property with a new front door.

It's rare for listing agents to recommend major upgrades to the exterior of a home in order to sell it, but one upgrade that can prove worthwhile is a new front door. The cost: perhaps a few hundred dollars at most.

"The front door is the focal point of the house. If it's attractive, people will focus on this," Ellsworth says.

If you don't want to spend the time or money to replace your front door, consider other, less costly steps, such as repainting the door or adding new polished brass hardware.

-- Emphasize highly visible upgrades.

Not all sellers have time to make surface enhancements to their home, especially if they're making an urgent move. But those with sufficient time -- and funds -- generally more than recoup their expenses, Ellsworth says.

Flowers, new greenery and freshly pruned shrubs help entice buyers who might otherwise refuse to venture inside. Also, outlays for interior painting, carpet replacement or hardwood floor improvements are typically worth doing, as is replacement of outdated kitchen appliances.

"Very visible improvements could pay you back several times over," she says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)