Tom Early, a real estate broker since 1981, has seen a distinct trend across the decades. These days a woman is more likely to insist on keeping a home she bought before marriage -- even after partnering with a man who already owns a place.

"Sometimes a career woman refuses to surrender her property," says Early, a past president of the National Association of Exclusive Buyer Agents. "She's earned that home and it's her trophy. That's the same way many men feel about their cave."

Of course, not every marrying couple can afford to keep two homes. And couples who plan to have children together usually favor living full-time under one roof. But empty nesters on their second marriage now occasionally opt for two domiciles, so long as they can see each other on weekends and vacations without undue hardship.

"Let's face it, most people aren't jet-setters like the celebrities in People magazine who marry but still keep her place in New York and his in Los Angeles. Besides, very few people want to live that far from a mate," Early says.

Even so, there are legitimate reasons why some couples wish to keep their two homes after the wedding. One is that very often partners -- who are committed to their respective careers -- originally bought properties near their places of work.

"Suppose she owns a house near her office in Minneapolis and he has a condo walking distance from his job in St. Paul. This is one couple who might decide to keep both the condo and the house and then rendezvous on weekends," Early says.

Alternatively, such a couple might split the difference, sell both properties and buy a place together that's midway between the two Minnesota cities.

But Mark Nash, author of "1001 Tips for Buying & Selling a Home," says more couples are now opting for a two-city lifestyle.

"We're getting away from what we used to call 'the trailing spouse.' Now each partner wants to keep what they have going into the relationship," he says.

In some instances, dual-city homeownership can enhance the romantic life of spouses who live separately on weekdays and then reunite at week's end, says Esther Perel, author of "Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence."

The weekends "can be a wonderful reunion time for some couples," Perel says.

Of course, there can be pitfalls in the dual-city approach to homeownership. Here are a few pointers:

-- Consider the implications if young children are involved.

Perel cautions that such a situation can add stress when one or both partners are parenting infants, toddlers or school-age kids.

"This living arrangement can become burdensome to the person who manages the children during weekdays," she says, adding that this situation can lead to resentment in the partner who's shouldering more responsibility.

Also, she says kids who grow up with parents who live in two households may be shortchanged the kind of nurturing they need to thrive -- even if the parents are happily married.

-- Think twice about the impact of added travel.

"All that travel back and forth can become tiresome on the relationship," Perel notes.

Travel costs can also mount up.

"People sometimes forget to add up the full cost of commuter marriages in both time and money," Nash says.

-- Factor in the financial consequences beyond travel costs.

When considering expenses associated with the ownership of two homes, Nash says you should always look beyond the cash flow implications of carrying two mortgages. Also make sure you add in the extra costs you'll likely face for insurance, taxes, repairs and maintenance.

To assess the full financial implications of dual-city homeownership, Nash recommends you consider meeting with a trusted financial planner who's paid on a fee-only basis, rather than from commissions on the sale of stocks or insurance.

"Look for someone who can objectively evaluate whether it's prudent to keep two homes -- not a planner who will try selling you lots of financial products," Nash says.

One way to find a fee-only planner in your area is to visit the website of the National Association of Personal Financial Advisors: www.napfa.org. Also, you can find fee-only planners willing to work with you for just an hour or two by visiting the website of the Garrett Planning Network: www.garrettplanningnetwork.com.

-- Realize the possibility that distance could enhance your relationship.

Couples who choose to live in two homes are taking a non-traditional route. But, as Nash says, this avenue could be one that maintains the quality of life for one or both partners -- especially if it results in professional fulfillment and their two properties appreciate in value over time.

Also, Nash says he knows a number of two-house couples who've avoided the kind of bickering that sometimes troubles those who live together all the time.

"As the old expression goes, 'familiarity breeds contempt.' But when you see each other only on weekends and vacations, you're less aware of each other's flaws and more aware of the love that brought you together in the first place," he says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

This summer, two houses on the same suburban street went up for sale on the same day. One -- a farmhouse style property with few updates -- sold within a week for the full list price. The other -- a stately colonial with numerous luxury improvements -- still languishes unsold.

Why did one property fly off the market while the other seems to scare away buyers? Eric Tyson, a personal finance expert, says the difference was undoubtedly that one was priced correctly from the outset, while the other was overpriced.

"Overprice your place and it can easily get a tainted reputation," says Tyson, co-author of "House Selling for Dummies" and other real estate books. "People will start asking what's wrong with that house? And the number of showings will slow down or come to a complete halt."

He says the sellers of the colonial house in this true story are now being punished for trying to push their opening list price above what comparable properties in the same neighborhood have fetched in recent months.

"Against the advice of their listing agents, a fair number of sellers engage in what's called 'needs-based' pricing," Tyson says. "Rather than face reality, they price for the net dollars they want for retirement or to buy a better house.

Here are a few pointers in regard to pricing:

-- Acknowledge the importance of proper pricing.

Tom Early, a long-time real estate broker, says that even in hot neighborhoods, the current generation of buyers is extremely price-conscious.

"Buyers today are no fools," he says. "They haven't forgotten the big drop off in real estate values that occurred during the financial crisis. So they take a very calculating approach when considering a purchase."

Despite tight inventories of homes available for sale in many communities, buyers will readily brush aside a property they perceive to be overpriced. Early says a real estate agent who recommends the true value of a property is an invaluable ally to owners in their quest to sell successfully.

"A house that's priced too high when it first hits the market can get a serious stigma and will ultimately go for less than it would have if fairly priced from the beginning," Early says.

-- Seek a general idea on value before engaging a listing agent.

These days there are multiple websites offering a free and immediate assessment of home values. One of the best known is Zillow.com.

Early cautions that such "fast pricing" sites can't be expected to yield a definitive answer on the value of your property. Still, they're a good starting point.

Another way to get a feel for prevailing prices before engaging an agent is to attend open houses in your community.

"It's always tremendously helpful to view directly how others in your same neighborhood have priced their property," Early says.

-- Meet with at least three real estate agents before hiring one.

When it's their turn to sell a home, many owners simply default to a trusted friend or relative who happens to be in the real estate business. But Early strongly advises against choosing an agent from your inner circle -- even if that person has sold many nearby properties.

"The reality is that it's hard for a friend or relative to tell you the unvarnished truth about market value or to advise you on changes you need to get your house sold," he says.

Even so, Early says your friends and relatives, along with neighbors, can be a good source for helping you create a short list of candidates to interview.

Ask each agent to give you a candid assessment on the condition of your place, as well as a pricing recommendation. Find out if they based their price suggestion on recent sales of comparable homes in the neighborhood and if so, which ones.

-- Ask for data on the agents' track records on pricing.

One way to size up the pricing aptitude of prospective agents is to examine a few key numbers that reflect their track record on prior sales. Of particular importance are "list-to-sale" statistics. These compare the original asking price against the sum ultimately paid by the buyers.

If the agent is routinely making realistic price recommendations, there should be relatively little disparity between the original list price and the final sale price.

"There shouldn't be much difference at all if the agent hit the target right from the start," Early says.

-- Don't go into denial on a well-grounded assessment of your home's value.

Some sellers are convinced that real estate agents are inclined to recommend a low price in hopes of scoring a quick sale. But Early says the greater risk is that an occasional agent will push for too high a price in hopes of attracting your business.

"Most listing agents deal honestly and won't try to sweet talk you to capture your listing. But watch out for those few who would take you down a primrose path," he says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

With the oldest baby boomers now approaching their 70s, demographers say the number of homeowners who are downsizing is expected to climb in coming years.

"All five of my last home sales involved downsizing boomers," says Sid Davis, a veteran real estate broker.

Davis, the author of "A Survival Guide to Selling a Home," tells the true story of one of his clients, a widow of 69 who, due to medical problems, must sell her 3,500-square-foot house on one-third of an acre. The widow and her family plan to work off a checklist of pre-sale tasks provided by Davis.

To ease the strain of their parents' transition, he urges the offspring of downsizers to step in with assistance as early as possible -- especially if a sudden health setback is prompting the move.

"A short deadline compounds the problems of getting the house sold. That's why I advise clients to tackle the matter as soon as their elders want or need help," Davis says.

Diana Gaydon, a broker who specializes in helping seniors, recommends that sellers line up appointments with three potential listing agents as soon as a move is planned. She also advises that you select a kindhearted agent who provides personal attention to clients.

"Your parents need to have a gut level of comfort with the agent they choose," says Gaydon, who holds the designation of Seniors Real Estate Specialist, conferred by the National Association of Realtors. (For a local referral, go to www.seniorsrealestate.com.)

Here are a few pointers for the adult children of downsizing elders:

-- Honor your parents' deep attachment to their home.

Some couples, including those with a history of corporate transfers or military postings, find it relatively easy to ready a home for sale. But those who've stayed put through their retirement years typically have a tougher time letting go of their belongings.

"If your parents have been accumulating possessions for decades, you can't expect them to dispense with all that stuff in a hurry. Remember they want to make their own decisions for as long as they possibly can," Davis says.

While a senior's family members can be very helpful with many aspects of the housing transition, Davis says it's unwise for them to become involved in the de-cluttering work itself.

Ideally, he recommends that the parents engage the help of a professional organizer, assuming they can afford it. One source for local referrals is the National Association of Professional Organizers. (www.napo.net). For a lesser fee, (perhaps $10 to $15 an hour), they could likely find an energetic student by posting a local ad.

-- Don't pressure your parents to let go of valued items.

Real estate agents say personal items shouldn't be on display during showings, because that makes it hard for buyers to picture themselves living in the property. Even so, sellers shouldn't be cajoled into dispensing with prized possessions.

Gaydon says that in addition to photographs, many downsizers find it comforting to retain a few well-used pieces of furniture, such as the dining room table on which they served Thanksgiving dinners for many years.

To help smooth the transition for your elders, guarantee you'll safeguard their valuables during the home-showing period, Gaydon says.

"For example, you might tell them you'll take those coveted photos they have hanging on the wall and place them in a nice box on your piano until their house is sold," she says.

-- Show sensitivity when helping parents sell belongings.

Conducting a garage sale to eliminate excess household items might sound like a good idea. But the aggressive behavior of some who frequent such sales can be unnerving. Your parents might be hurt if they overhear strangers haggling over items they've used for years.

Rather than holding a garage sale, Davis recommends you ask your parents for the names of their favorite charities and arrange to have their giveaways taken there. (Valuable antiques and art can be sold through a dealer or an online company such as eBay.)

-- Use tact when discussing needed updates to your parents' property.

Those who've lived in the same home for a long time are often very comfortable with its decor, no matter how dated. But their grown kids typically agree with the listing agent that the home should be updated to more contemporary standards before it goes on the market.

The problem is you could face lots of pushback if you try to press your parents into replacing their still-functioning chocolate-colored refrigerator, for example. Likewise, they might rebuff you if you demand they have their 20-year-old lime-green carpeting torn up and replaced with fresh carpeting in a neutral beige.

Instead of trying to pressure your parents into updates to receive greater proceeds from their property, try reasoning with them. Then if they still refuse, back off.

"It's not worth risking the happiness of the family to get more dollars from a sale," Davis says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)