Many homebuyers think that the more affluent the neighborhood, the more welcoming it is to newcomers who move there. But the opposite is often true.

"In expensive neighborhoods, everybody is busy. People in professional jobs work extra hours and their kids are programmed in a zillion activities. Nobody has time to get together," says Laureen Kennedy, a real estate agent affiliated with the Council of Residential Specialists (www.crs.com).

Although there are no guarantees in any neighborhood, Kennedy says homebuyers looking for a cohesive community stand a better chance of finding it in a middle-income area than a high-end one.

Kennedy points to several factors that tend to reduce the friendliness quotient in high-end neighborhoods. For one thing, people in such areas are more likely to hire landscaping firms, meaning they're less likely to mingle over lawn care chores. Also, more well-to-do parents send their children to private (rather than public) schools, making it less likely their kids will know each other and pal around.

Still another reason is that -- with some exceptions -- many upscale houses are surrounded by spacious grounds, which discourages casual interaction, says Peter Lovenheim, author of "In the Neighborhood: The Search for Community on an American Street, One Sleepover at a Time."

Lovenheim used the unusual tactic of arranging sleepovers for himself at neighbors' homes, to become better acquainted with them. He says many people are eager to live in close-knit communities but are uncertain how to bond and keep up ties.

Are you moving to a new area and want a friendly community? If so, Lovenheim offers a few clues that could help in your search. Look for a neighborhood that sponsors group events -- like picnics, porch parties and a Fourth of July celebration. Also, ask if the community publishes a residents' directory or uses an online forum for residents to stay in touch.

Here are a few additional pointers:

-- Seek out an area with strong parental involvement in the schools.

People who place a premium on neighborhood closeness do well to focus on school quality. That's because strong schools draw people together -- tightening ties for residents of all ages, says William Bainbridge, president of the SchoolMatch Institute, (www.schoolmatch.com), which provides consumers with comparative information on school quality.

Is it necessary to move to an affluent area to find an exceptional school? Not necessarily, says Bainbridge, who contends that parental involvement is a primary factor in school quality, and that can be found anywhere.

Strong neighborhood schools help promote solidarity, says Mark Nash, a veteran real estate broker and author of "1001 Tips for Buying and Selling a Home."

"Kids are the glue that holds everybody together," he says.

-- Drive through a neighborhood at multiple times of the day.

Once you've narrowed your search to a particular community, Nash suggests you visit at different times of the day and, ideally, on a weekday as well as a weekend.

"To get a full picture, I tell clients to drive or walk through the area at least four times different times: during the morning, mid-afternoon, at dinnertime and again at 11 p.m.," Nash says.

He says visiting in the evening is especially important. The idea is to observe whether most residents spend non-work hours holed up in their homes or are outside exercising, walking their dogs and relating in a friendly manner.

-- Ask about the social dynamics of the neighborhood.

Buyers intent on finding a friendly community are well advised to spend some time asking how people relate to each other.

"Besides just driving through, you can learn a lot about people's attitudes and behavior by going door-to-door on a Saturday and striking up informal conversations," Nash says.

During these conversations, ask residents about the pros and cons of living in the area. If anyone resists opening up, just move on to the next house.

"Explain that you're interested in living in their area and want to know more about it. If you're relaxed and friendly, most people will respond candidly," Nash says.

-- Don't assume that a newly built neighborhood will be unfriendly.

Are you interested in a subdivision that's still under development but fear it could be a cold, aloof area in which to raise a family? If so, Kennedy suggests you learn more about the community before automatically rejecting it.

The residents of newly constructed neighborhoods are typically two-income families with parents in their 20s to 40s who have demanding daily schedules. Even so, many who move to these new areas seek lasting friendships with neighbors.

"Everyone is new at the same time -- making it more likely they'll be open to new friendships. Also, because their landscaping is unfinished, people are outside a lot, making it easier to connect. Then, too, there's a shared pride of homeownership in the new place," Kennedy says.

-- Don't forget that friendship is a reciprocal activity.

There are many advantages to having a support structure in the community where you live. Not only can you borrow enough gas to finish mowing your lawn should the need arise, but you can count on neighbors to look after your property when you're away on vacation or -- most importantly -- when you face an emergency.

"Maybe you're at work when your teenage son takes a nasty skateboard spill. If so, a neighbor with whom you're close could fill in at the hospital until you can make it there," Nash says.

But as he notes, moving to a friendly area won't guarantee you a strong support structure unless you invest the time necessary to get to know your neighbors and socialize on a day-to-day basis as well as at times of celebration.

"In reality, all solid relationships are mutual. That means you have to build friendships with your neighbors or you can't expect them to help you out much when you're in a bind," he says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

When it comes to purchasing a home, many people aren't especially hard to please. Sure they want a safe neighborhood, good schools and solid construction. But assuming they find a property with those elements, they're ready to bid.

If they lose out to rival bidders, there's no heartache because they figure they'll find another property that's equally nice.

But then there are rare homebuyers willing to spend months looking for the perfect home. They know exactly what they want or need and are willing to do what it takes to obtain it.

In this category was a doctor who specialized in emergency medicine and needed a property on a main road within one mile from his hospital. He and his wife -- also a physician -- also wanted an exceptional elementary school for their three young kids.

To meet their exacting requirements, Ashley Richardson -- the couple's real estate agent -- narrowed the search, finding just one home that qualified. The couple made a generous bid for it and prevailed.

"Some homebuyers are well justified for being fussy," says Richardson, who's affiliated with the Council of Residential Specialists (www.crs.com).

There can be many reasons why some buyers have a "must-have" feeling about a property. Some are captivated by historic details or the work of a specific architect. Others dream of a hard-to-find setting -- for example, a property that abuts a nature preserve. Others want to live very close to relatives.

Michael Crowley, a real estate broker and past president of the National Association of Exclusive Buyer Agents (www.naeba.org), tells the true story of a woman in her 20s who insisted on buying right next to her grandfather -- an ailing 70-year-old.

"The minute that next-door house came on the market, she had to have it. That was the only place she'd even consider and price didn't seem to matter. In fact, she overpaid," Crowley recalls.

John Rygiol, an independent real estate broker who specializes in working solely with buyers, says an increasing number of baby boomers now wish to live close to their grown children. They also want a one-level house, which -- depending on the area -- could narrow their search parameters dramatically.

He says that in many neighborhoods a lack of available housing inventory is complicating the search for homebuyers with specific wants or needs.

Are you a homebuyer with exacting requirements? If so, these pointers could prove useful:

-- Make it clear you can afford the sellers' property.

Before accepting an offer, sellers want assurances that the buyers have the wherewithal to make good on a proposed deal. If you're competing for a one-of-a-kind property in an area with few listings, getting your financing lined up in advance is crucial.

One way to prove you're qualified is with a "pre-approval letter" from a bank or mortgage-lending firm. Such a letter is granted only after your credit history has been checked and your income verified. Proof of income can be demonstrated through pay stubs and W-2 statements.

To strengthen your bid even more, Crowley says it's wise to also provide copies of account statements showing you have the funds to cover both your down payment and closing costs. Also, note where you work and how long you've been employed there.

-- Submit a friendly letter along with your bid.

Crowley says it's almost universally true that people who've lived in a home for years become emotionally attached to it. Because this is so common, letting the sellers know you love their home could conceivably influence them to favor your offer. One way to show your appreciation is by attaching a brief letter to your bid.

What should you say in such a letter?

To be most effective, Crowley suggests you focus on areas that are apparent priorities for the home's owners.

"Look around the home and you can easily tell what the owners value most," he says.

-- Shape an offer adapted to the sellers' timing needs.

Though the bottom line is nearly always the leading factor that determines whether the sellers of a home accept, reject or counter your bid, timing also counts.

Suppose, for example, that the owners need to shed the property quickly because they're making an out-of-state job move. If so, they could wish to close quickly. On the other hand, a couple making an elaborate retirement move might prefer to delay closing for months. In either case, adapting to the sellers' timing could help you get your first offer accepted in a tight-market situation.

-- Consider trying to beat rivals by outbidding them -- within reason.

Rygiol calls it an "escalation clause" and, not surprisingly, it's a powerful tool that some buyers are now beginning to use to outdo other bidders in highly competitive markets. It's a clause in the sales contract that promises to pay a set amount above the highest bidder -- up to a maximum fixed sum.

But this should only be considered a sort of "nuclear option." Crowley says he tries to dissuade most clients from using such a clause -- no matter how much they want a home. He insists that typical purchasers who lose a home to another bidder later find another that's just as good or better.

"The minute you decide you have to have a house no matter the price, you're going to pay too much. As we found out in the last boom market, a feeding frenzy is not in the buyers' interest," Crowley says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

During the financial crisis, it was widely reported that many young Americans had lost interest in homeownership. They wanted a car and an iPhone, yes, yet were supposedly indifferent to the purchase of property.

But fast-forward to 2013 and real estate specialists say people in their 20s and 30s never really lost their taste for homeownership. Or if they did, it was only fleeting.

"The American dream of buying a home is alive and kicking. The yearning to own a place is in our collective DNA," says Sid Davis, a veteran real estate broker and author of "A Survival Guiding for Buying a Home."

He says first-time homebuyers are still influenced by the same motivations that led their parents and grandparents into homeownership.

"People want a safe place to raise a family and a backyard where their kids can play. They want to be able to decorate and paint the house a color of their choice --without interference from a landlord," Davis says.

He says the current resurgence in interest in homeownership among young adults is linked to low mortgage rates and still-reasonable prices that many wannabe owners worry cannot last.

"Home values are now rising nearly everywhere, which creates a sense of urgency to buy soon," Davis says.

But there are also factors restraining young adults in their pursuit of a home. One is that many who've attended college or grad school are laden with student loan payments, which can severely constrain their capacity to qualify for a mortgage.

Here are a few pointers for novice homebuyers:

-- Focus on financial planning first.

For young buyers making an entry-level income, questions often arise about how much they're willing to spend on housing versus other financial priorities, says Leo Berard, charter president of the National Association of Exclusive Buyer Agents (www.naeba.org).

"It's hard for people of all ages, but especially for young people, to balance their current desires for a great house with future plans that involve money, like traveling abroad or starting a family," Berard says.

Given the surge in foreclosures in the recent past, real estate agents and mortgage lenders are less likely than before to encourage buyers to max out their home loan eligibility. And buyers of all ages fear the implications of taking on too much debt.

"You don't want to be 'house poor.' So it's absolutely essential to project ahead for your money needs," says Berard, who encourages buyers to define their money goals before setting out to shop for a home.

Are you unsure how to go about conducting a financial analysis? In that case, you might benefit from a few hours spent with a trusted accountant or financial planner. One source of referrals for fee-only financial planners willing to work on an hourly basis is through the Garrett Financial Planning Network (www.garrettplanningnetwork.com).

-- Look at property alternatives before picking a home.

Realtors who work with first-time buyers say that many -- including those living in small apartments -- are often so wowed by the first property they visit that they're prone to making a hasty choice. But until they've considered alternatives in the same or nearby neighborhoods, Berard says it's smart for them to keep their options open.

Imagine you're focused on a townhouse with a terrace in a brand-new gated development on the western side of a likeable suburb. Before you bid on that townhouse, however, you might wish to investigate what your money would buy in a detached dwelling on the eastern side of town where the yards are larger.

The benefits of comparison shopping may seem obvious. Nevertheless, many homebuyers do less of it than do car buyers, Berard says.

-- Do a comparative sales analysis before you bid.

To price their properties correctly, it's long been common practice for home sellers to rely on their listing agents for a review of recent sale prices in the neighborhood where they're selling. But Davis says it's an equally good idea for homebuyers to do a review of recent sales -- ideally for deals that have closed in the prior six months.

"The more recent the sales data, the better," he says.

Are you seeking to buy in an area where few similar homes have sold lately? If so, you may need to rely on comparable sales of dissimilar homes in the same neighborhood.

"Even if the houses are all different in architecture, you still can at least compare them on a price-per-square-foot basis," Davis says.

Besides examining comparable sales, he says that homebuyers should get a grasp on overall market trend for the neighborhood before bidding.

"Ask your agent to look at 'days on market' for the area. If it's taking longer for homes to sell, that could indicate that demand is dropping and vice versa," Davis says.

-- Allow sufficient time for a professional home inspection.

Are you a young homebuyer who wants to live in an established neighborhood where properties are more than 10 years old? If so, Berard says you should be doubly sure your offer is conditional on a thorough home inspection that can detect any serious flaws or structural problems with the property you've selected.

"As young buyers, you should be especially concerned that you've caught any defects that would be exceptionally costly to fix. If your inspector finds serious problems, you'll need an escape hatch," Berard says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)