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When Selling, Don't Let Emotions Get in the Way

Smart Moves by by Ellen James Martin
by Ellen James Martin
Smart Moves | January 2nd, 2013

It can be gut-wrenching to sell a home that evokes long years of fond memories.

But Sid Davis, an experienced real estate broker, advises those who must let go of a treasured property to find ways to keep emotions in check -- even when buyers make critical comments about their place.

"People feel about their homes like they feel about their kids ... you're going to take it personally," he says.

Davis knows from personal experience how hard it can be to hear negative comments. A few years back when he listed his family's house -- a sprawling ranch-style place -- he became incensed by strangers' remarks.

Indeed, the comments of strangers so upset Davis that he summarily rejected three offers made by would-be buyers who noted flaws in his house. Rather than negotiate with them, he simply wrote "no" on their bids.

"Because I'm a broker, I thought it would be super easy selling my own house. But my ego and emotions got in the way," says Davis, author of "A Survival Guide to Selling a Home."

The message is clear: If you want to sell your home quickly and for the highest possible price, stay calm and approach the process dispassionately. Here are a few pointers for sellers:

-- Don't hide your feelings from your listing agent.

"There are as many kinds of agents just as there are clients. If you believe your agent isn't listening to you and grasping your feelings, make a change to another agent," says Dorcas Helfant, an experienced broker and real estate company owner.

Before your property is entered onto the Multiple Listing Service, Helfant says you may wish to have a full discussion with the agent and to vent your feelings. "Be honest. It's beneficial for everyone involved if the agent understands the feelings around your selling decision. A caring agent will help you navigate a rocky transition," says Helfant, a former president of the National Association of Realtors (www.realtor.org).

-- Avoid direct contact with home shoppers.

"Because selling a family house can be especially painful -- not only for the parents but also the children -- it's a challenge for the sellers to keep thinking in a businesslike way. You need to protect everyone in the family as much as possible," Helfant says.

One way to help protect the family from unpleasant remarks is to make sure everyone is absent when visitors come through, he says. As soon as your property is shown for sale, you can assume some visitors will say and do things that puncture your pride.

To ensure that your selling process stays on track, you need feedback about buyers' reactions to your home. But it's less hurtful if these comments are filtered through your listing agent, he says.

-- Remove personal items before your home is shown to visitors.

If you're like most homeowners, you view your place as a sanctuary and an appropriate place to display treasured items. These might include a wide array of collectibles -- like valuable glassware inherited from your grandmother -- or one-of-a-kind memorabilia, such as sports trophies or war medals. They could also include many family photos, political, religious or artistic items.

Helfant urges you to remove such items before your house goes on the market. Not only might they elicit unkind remarks from visitors, but they could deflect attention from the property itself.

There's yet another reason to remove your treasures: security. Why risk the chance your precious belongings could be damaged or stolen?

-- Expect comments from neighbors if your place is slow to sell.

If your home languishes on the market for an unexpectedly long time, your emotions can intensify, a situation made worse if nosy neighbors intervene and start asking questions.

"People in the community begin to panic when a home takes a long time to sell. You can assume neighbors will come over and ask what's wrong. They fear an unsold home will hurt their property values, and they'll take their fears to your doorstep," Davis says.

You may feel unfairly ambushed if neighbors begin making inquiries. But, as he says, try not to become defensive and begin blaming a "bad market" for your problem.

"The most constructive reaction to these unpleasant questions is to look into the real reasons your place hasn't sold," Davis says.

-- Don't allow your emotions to keep you from making needed upgrades.

"If your house is correctly priced and you live in one of those top-of-the-food-chain neighborhoods, yet people still aren't making offers on your house, the reason is probably condition. The odds are your house is dirty, smells bad, is cluttered or looks bad from the curb," Davis says.

Before resorting to a big price cut on your unsold home, Davis urges you to ask your listing agent, along with trusted friends and family members, to go through the place and give you their frank reactions in a diplomatic way.

Rather than taking such critiques personally, as many owners do, try to follow any suggestions that can reasonably be made and do so promptly.

"It won't necessarily cost that much to make your home show a whole lot better. Cleaning, painting, de-cluttering and a little yard work can make a world of difference for very little money," Davis says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

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When to Sell and How to Do It

Smart Moves by by Ellen James Martin
by Ellen James Martin
Smart Moves | December 26th, 2012

A year or two ago, when a multitude of homes were on the market, many people couldn't be arm-twisted into making a purchase. Yet now that inventories have dwindled dramatically, things have changed.

"I've been working nonstop for 30 days trying to find houses for buyers. Multiple bids are common. And sometimes buyers grab a house before it hits the market," says Ashley Richardson, a real estate agent who's busier now than at any point in her 11-year career in the field.

Why the mismatch between supply and demand?

Richardson says many homeowners who tried and failed to sell their property in 2011 or early 2012 became discouraged and decided to rent out their property instead. Others have postponed selling because their homes are still "underwater," meaning they owe more on the mortgage than the place is worth.

Meanwhile, she says would-be buyers who've been waiting on the sidelines until the economy improves are suddenly out in force. They're paying more rent than they'd like and are anxious to take advantage of record-low interest rates while they're still available.

Are you a potential home seller puzzling over the timing of your sale? If so, these few pointers could help:

-- Seek to sell when there are few rival homes on the market.

Are few homes now up for sale in your area? If so, you may wish to go forward with a planned sale within 30 days or so, Richardson says.

"You're always better off being the only one out there, because competition drives prices down," she says.

Often, sellers prefer to wait until spring to list their property. But anyone who postpones risks the possibility of less favorable selling conditions, says Mary McCall, a veteran real estate broker and president of the Council of Residential Specialists (www.crs.com).

"When it comes to real estate, no one has a crystal ball. But I believe that by the end of January, For Sale signs will be sprouting like tulips. We're heading to a more balanced market between buyers and sellers," McCall says.

McCall says the most efficient way to obtain information on local inventory levels is to check with local listing agents. They should have access to the latest statistics and can brief you on trends.

-- Wait until repairs and de-cluttering are complete before trying to sell.

Do you have tattered carpet that needs to be replaced? Is there peeling paint on your front door? Are you still sorting through the contents of an overstuffed bookshelf?

Then make sure all this work is done before giving your agent approval to list your place, Richardson says. She says buyers typically show little interest in any home where renovation work is incomplete.

Likewise, a cluttered house can be very hard to market to prospects, who often underestimate the size of rooms ridden with excess furniture and cardboard boxes. Also, closets crammed full of clothes and shoes make a bad impression.

"When your closets are crowded, people think you have less storage than you really do," she says.

-- Avoid the weekend when selecting a day to launch your listing.

Richardson believes no one should obsess about the day of the week their agent lists their property in the Multiple Listing Service. But she says it's better to avoid having it appear on a Saturday or Sunday.

"During the work week, buyers monitor their email from the office for new listings sent them by their agent. But on weekends, they're often too busy running errands and driving kids around to pay much attention to email," Richardson says.

In her opinion, the ideal time for sellers to list a property is early in the week. Then, if the place still catches the interest of buyers when they drive by, they'll have sufficient time to plan a tour of the interior.

-- Don't play pricing games once you've decided to sell.

Homeowners who've given their agent the green light to list are rarely justified in attempting to "test the market" with a price that's more than five to 10 percent above the value of comparable homes, according to McCall.

She cautions that overpricing a property can add weeks or even months to the sale process.

What's more, sellers who start too high often find it necessary to cut their price one or more times before finding a willing buyer. And this can result in smaller proceeds than they would have gotten with a realistic price from the outset.

That's because buyer interest in a home usually fades within fewer than 30 days after it hits the market. And once a house has languished unsold for a lengthy period, it typically develops a stigma.

"Even though there are more buyers out looking for property, this is still a time to price realistically. It's not the time for sellers to get greedy," McCall says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

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Overcoming the Fears That Keep You From Buying a Home

Smart Moves by by Ellen James Martin
by Ellen James Martin
Smart Moves | December 19th, 2012

Joyce Bytof, a long-time real estate broker, has 23 grandchildren age 25 to 34. As a strong advocate for homeownership, she's on a mission to persuade all of them to buy a place of their own.

"So far I've convinced eight to buy -- which means I have 15 left to go," says Bytof, who owns a major Coldwell Banker real estate business in Wisconsin.

Despite her professional guidance on real estate, she says her grandkids are still nervous about buying and fear the impact of economic uncertainty.

"They're scared the economy will take a tumble and they'll become house poor. Once they get a mortgage, they worry they won't have enough pennies to go out and have fun or to have a family," Bytof says.

She reports that all eight of the grandchildren who've bought houses so far are pleased they made the move. One reason is that they avoided overextending themselves and taking on an uncomfortably large mortgage.

She tells of one granddaughter who recently bought a first home with her husband. Still in their mid 20s, the couple deliberately chose a place below their means to give them financial leeway.

For a mortgage payment only slightly higher than what they paid each month for the modest duplex they were renting, they bought a three-bedroom bungalow with a one-car garage and a sizeable yard.

Bytof says a sensible, well-planned approach to homeownership helps calm the anxieties of many novices. Here are a few common fears and how to surmount them:

-- Fear of revealing your credit history to a mortgage lender.

Sid Davis, a real estate broker and author of "A Survival Guide to Buying a Home," says many wannabe homeowners worry how their credit histories will be viewed by mortgage lenders. But he says such concerns are usually baseless -- even during the present period when lending standards are stringent.

"In my experience, 90 percent of these fears are simply fears of the unknown," he says.

Mortgage pre-approval -- which lets buyers assess their borrowing capability before they head out to shop for a property -- is now easily obtained over the phone. Even so, Bytof says some first-timers prefer to go to the lender's office for pre-approval.

"If it makes you more comfortable, go see the lender in person and ask your agent to go with you," she says.

Also, to ensure they're being quoted a competitive rate for their mortgage, she encourages all buyers to shop lenders before submitting a formal loan application.

"Credit unions can be excellent sources of mortgage money and sometimes run specials, as do small and large banks," Bytof says.

-- Fear of negative judgments on your home choice from family members.

Most first-time homebuyers are in their 20s or 30s. On financial matters, many still look to parents for guidance. But sometimes the intervention of elders can backfire.

"We've had parents blow up deals for young buyers," Bytof says.

If you're afraid to go forward without your parents' help, she suggests you bring them along on your house-hunting trips. That way they can compare various alternatives and will likely give you more objective advice.

But Bytof cautions young buyers against giving parents a veto over their final property selection -- even if they're helping fund the down payment.

"Assuming they've done their homework and had the property fully inspected, more young people should tell their parents to stay out of the final decision-making process," she says.

-- Fear of making a major error.

Because they realize that the home-buying decision is a major one, Davis says many wannabe homebuyers become risk averse, worrying they'll select the wrong property. And such fears are understandable in the aftermath of the housing crisis. That's because by now, almost everyone knows someone who overpaid for a property and then lost it through foreclosure.

"New buyers often feel they're walking through a swamp of unknowns. But a lot of their anxieties are needless," Davis says.

He believes the best remedy for home-selection stress is solid information. Work with a real estate agent who can accurately advise on the true market value of any property you're considering, thereby reducing your chances of overpaying.

"It's a good thing for young buyers to get a lot of hand-holding from a reputable agent -- ideally one who enjoys helping first-timers," Davis says.

-- Fear of lacking sufficient cash to go through with a home purchase.

Of course, it can be costly to make a housing change at any stage of your life. But Davis says many long-time renters overestimate how much cash they need to become owners.

Granted, no-down-payment mortgages are harder to obtain than before the downturn. But as he notes, buyers can still get into a first property for little or no down through programs offered by the Veterans Administration (www.va.gov) or the Federal Housing Administration (www.fha.gov and www.hud.gov). Also, many state and local governments still fund first-time buyer assistance programs.

"The key here is to find a sharp mortgage lender who's aware of all the options open to you," Davis says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

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