Joyce Bytof, a long-time real estate broker, has 23 grandchildren age 25 to 34. As a strong advocate for homeownership, she's on a mission to persuade all of them to buy a place of their own.

"So far I've convinced eight to buy -- which means I have 15 left to go," says Bytof, who owns a major Coldwell Banker real estate business in Wisconsin.

Despite her professional guidance on real estate, she says her grandkids are still nervous about buying and fear the impact of economic uncertainty.

"They're scared the economy will take a tumble and they'll become house poor. Once they get a mortgage, they worry they won't have enough pennies to go out and have fun or to have a family," Bytof says.

She reports that all eight of the grandchildren who've bought houses so far are pleased they made the move. One reason is that they avoided overextending themselves and taking on an uncomfortably large mortgage.

She tells of one granddaughter who recently bought a first home with her husband. Still in their mid 20s, the couple deliberately chose a place below their means to give them financial leeway.

For a mortgage payment only slightly higher than what they paid each month for the modest duplex they were renting, they bought a three-bedroom bungalow with a one-car garage and a sizeable yard.

Bytof says a sensible, well-planned approach to homeownership helps calm the anxieties of many novices. Here are a few common fears and how to surmount them:

-- Fear of revealing your credit history to a mortgage lender.

Sid Davis, a real estate broker and author of "A Survival Guide to Buying a Home," says many wannabe homeowners worry how their credit histories will be viewed by mortgage lenders. But he says such concerns are usually baseless -- even during the present period when lending standards are stringent.

"In my experience, 90 percent of these fears are simply fears of the unknown," he says.

Mortgage pre-approval -- which lets buyers assess their borrowing capability before they head out to shop for a property -- is now easily obtained over the phone. Even so, Bytof says some first-timers prefer to go to the lender's office for pre-approval.

"If it makes you more comfortable, go see the lender in person and ask your agent to go with you," she says.

Also, to ensure they're being quoted a competitive rate for their mortgage, she encourages all buyers to shop lenders before submitting a formal loan application.

"Credit unions can be excellent sources of mortgage money and sometimes run specials, as do small and large banks," Bytof says.

-- Fear of negative judgments on your home choice from family members.

Most first-time homebuyers are in their 20s or 30s. On financial matters, many still look to parents for guidance. But sometimes the intervention of elders can backfire.

"We've had parents blow up deals for young buyers," Bytof says.

If you're afraid to go forward without your parents' help, she suggests you bring them along on your house-hunting trips. That way they can compare various alternatives and will likely give you more objective advice.

But Bytof cautions young buyers against giving parents a veto over their final property selection -- even if they're helping fund the down payment.

"Assuming they've done their homework and had the property fully inspected, more young people should tell their parents to stay out of the final decision-making process," she says.

-- Fear of making a major error.

Because they realize that the home-buying decision is a major one, Davis says many wannabe homebuyers become risk averse, worrying they'll select the wrong property. And such fears are understandable in the aftermath of the housing crisis. That's because by now, almost everyone knows someone who overpaid for a property and then lost it through foreclosure.

"New buyers often feel they're walking through a swamp of unknowns. But a lot of their anxieties are needless," Davis says.

He believes the best remedy for home-selection stress is solid information. Work with a real estate agent who can accurately advise on the true market value of any property you're considering, thereby reducing your chances of overpaying.

"It's a good thing for young buyers to get a lot of hand-holding from a reputable agent -- ideally one who enjoys helping first-timers," Davis says.

-- Fear of lacking sufficient cash to go through with a home purchase.

Of course, it can be costly to make a housing change at any stage of your life. But Davis says many long-time renters overestimate how much cash they need to become owners.

Granted, no-down-payment mortgages are harder to obtain than before the downturn. But as he notes, buyers can still get into a first property for little or no down through programs offered by the Veterans Administration (www.va.gov) or the Federal Housing Administration (www.fha.gov and www.hud.gov). Also, many state and local governments still fund first-time buyer assistance programs.

"The key here is to find a sharp mortgage lender who's aware of all the options open to you," Davis says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

More than a million real estate agents belong to the National Association of Realtors (www.realtor.org), but a number have become inactive in recent years.

"The bad real estate market knocked out many bad agents," says Karen Rittenhouse, author of "The Essential Handbook for Selling a Home," and owner of a realty firm.

She recommends that home sellers search for an agent who is "energetic, motivated, self-starting and go-getting." Also, look for someone familiar enough with your area to recommend a list price that's neither too high nor too low.

"Pricing a house right is 90 percent of the battle to getting it sold," says Rittenhouse.

Although many sellers take a casual approach to choosing a real estate agent -- picking a friend or relative at random -- she suggests a more methodical method.

"You have a huge amount of money at stake when you sell your house and a strong agent can make a meaningful difference," she says.

Here are a few tips for sellers:

-- Interview agents thoroughly.

Home sellers are routinely advised to interview at least three agents. But Rittenhouse says most sellers hire the first agent they call and do a cursory interview at most.

"You need to interview at least three agents and go in-depth with your questions. Take the process as seriously as if you were hiring a nanny to care for your kids," she says.

-- Seek a straight-talker.

Michael Crowley, a veteran real estate broker who works solely with home buyers, says an all-too-common mistake involves putting an overly high starting price on a property to "test the market," and then taking the price down peg by peg until the place sells.

"Overpricing costs you in the end. By asking too much at the beginning, you actually lengthen your selling time and probably reduce your net proceeds," he says.

Crowley cautions sellers to be wary of any agent who proposes a price substantially higher than that recommended by the other agents they've interviewed.

Also, Crowley says you should be wary of any agent who glosses over the repairs and upgrades needed to make a house saleable for the best possible price.

"If your carpet is ragged around the edges, and the agent doesn't tell you it needs replacing, watch out. He's just telling you what you want to hear, not what you need to know," Crowley says.

-- Select an agent to help with mortgage snags.

Because so many mortgages have gone into foreclosure in recent years, it's understandable that lenders are nervous about making new loans. Also, they're facing increasing scrutiny from government regulators.

"There are now many more roadblocks before anyone can get a mortgage to the finishing line," Rittenhouse says.

Before the economic downturn, home sellers and their agents didn't need to fret much about whether the buyer's loan was approved. But now the lending process is so tricky that a listing agent may also need to get involved.

"A knowledgeable seller's agent who has mortgage contacts can help clear obstacles to get an endangered transaction through," Rittenhouse says.

Be sure to ask your prospective agents to tell you how they handled mortgage snafus when they arose in the past.

-- Choose an agent who's an effective negotiator.

As a real estate investor who is continually buying and selling property, Rittenhouse knows how much skill is involved in doing deals.

"Whether you're on the buyer's or seller's side of the table, there's a tremendous amount of negotiation that goes on," she says.

Housing bargains are harder to find than they were just a year or two ago. Still, many would-be homebuyers, as well as investors, continue to troll for deals. And these so-called "bottom fishers" are likely to offer a first bid well below the true market value of your property.

Sellers were once advised to merely dismiss such "lowball offers." But if you live in a neighborhood where the supply of homes still exceeds demand, you may want to think twice. And a listing agent who is persuasive can sometimes bring a lowball bid up to a realistic level through skillful counteroffers.

As Rittenhouse says, one effective way for the listing agent to shape a strong counteroffer is with a comparative analysis of recent sales of similar homes in the same neighborhood.

Rittenhouse says savvy listing agents know to attach a written analysis of neighborhood values to any counter offer they submit on behalf of clients.

-- Pick an agent with good interpersonal skills.

Crowley says many people underestimate the importance of choosing an agent whom they find personable. Yet it can be very awkward and uncomfortable to go through the entire selling process with someone you dislike.

Also, as Crowley notes, hiring a listing agent who's on favorable terms with others in the local real estate community can hasten your sale. That's because real estate is a cooperative field, and your home is likely to be shown to more prospects if your agent is well liked by peers.

"Make sure you find an agent who's popular with other agents," he says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)

Do you hanker to trade your modest home for a majestic manse with a regal entrance, tall ceilings, a gourmet kitchen, five bedrooms, and a circular driveway out front?

If so, real-estate experts say you shouldn't expect the kind of discount you might have obtained just a year or two ago. But you can still do well on an upper-end home purchase in 2013.

Granted, many sumptuous properties are no longer available at the fire-sale prices of a few years ago. But buyers of high-end real estate can still get plenty for their money, says Karl E. Case, an economics professor emeritus at Wellesley College and co-founder of the Standard & Poor's/Case-Shiller indices, which track home price trends throughout the country.

"Interest rates are wonderfully low now, which means you can get a lot for your monthly mortgage payments. And if you buy a house you love, one real return on investment comes from the pleasure of living there," he says.

Case says that inventories are becoming very tight in many popular communities in the upper end of the price spectrum.

Why are grand houses currently in short supply in some areas? Case says one reason is that a large segment of the baby boomers have yet to downsize.

"Rather than sell during the recession, many redid their big houses. Because they improved for the long haul, they're staying put and not selling, at least in the near term," Case says.

Another factor limiting the supply of trade-up properties is that relatively few new houses were constructed during the economic downturn, Case says.

The growing shortage of high-end homes means that interested buyers may not be able to command the same level of leverage they did during the recession. But as a move-up buyer, you'll still fare well if you take a strategic approach.

Here are a few tips:

-- Seek out highly motivated sellers.

Though it may come as a surprise to some, the owners of upscale homes are no different from any other sellers -- some are a lot more driven than others, says Dorcas Helfant, a real estate broker and former president of the National Association of Realtors (www.realtor.org).

Hurried sellers, who may be moving due to a major lifestyle change such as a career shift or a divorce, are much more likely to negotiate in earnest.

"With inventories starting to shrink, sellers are more confident. Some are getting multiple offers. But even in these neighborhoods, you still have better odds of negotiating with sellers who are motivated to move," Helfant says.

If you politely question sellers on their reasons for moving, many will give you or your agent candid answers.

Helfant says it's often pointless trying to negotiate with sellers who convey a carefree attitude about their timing. You're much more likely to strike a favorable deal with people who must move.

-- Don't rule out properties that have gone "stale."

On occasion, genuinely motivated sellers hold out longer than they should, reducing their overly high list price only after desperation sets in.

"Even in premium neighborhoods, people who overshoot on price and then fail to sell for many months can be forced to drop their price below market value after buyer interest drops off," Helfant says.

Their problem is that homes that linger too long on the market become stigmatized.

"It can take a while for some otherwise motivated homeowners to realize they've been asking way too much. But if you're willing to wait, you might be rewarded for your patience," Helfant says.

-- Make your offer as clean as is possible.

Helfant tells the true story of some clients who traded up from a mid-sized bungalow to an impressive colonial. They were successful in obtaining $50,000 off the price for a fairly valued property because they wrote a "clean contract" on the place. They offered cash and promised to close in 30 days.

Why was the offer so appealing to the owners? Because they were under deadline pressure to move across the country for a job transfer and needed a sure-bet sale in a hurry.

"Motivated sellers are sometimes highly responsive to a bid that makes it easy and quick to close," Helfant says.

-- Consider making a counteroffer if the market warrants it.

Multiple offers are now more common than they were a year or two ago. But there are still neighborhoods, including high-end ones, where buyers continue to rule. Helfant says you can usually be more aggressive when negotiating with sellers in an area with lots of homes for sale.

Obviously, those seeking to buy a large or luxurious home have the most to gain on a percentage basis from tough negotiating.

-- Keep your eye on your ultimate goal.

Among those hoping to take advantage of low mortgage rates are older people who want what Helfant calls their "last-hurrah house." Such buyers often want such luxury features as elaborate gardens, at-home fitness centers and large, customized garages to house motorcycles and sports cars.

Getting a good deal is always a plus for homebuyers. But for older buyers, acquiring the exact place they want -- whether a country estate or a downtown loft -- can be even more important.

"Remember when you trade up, you're buying for lifestyle. You're looking for that perfect location, that perfect view or that perfect refuge from the world where you can find peace. So it's more than just the price that counts," Helfant says.

(To contact Ellen James Martin, email her at ellenjamesmartin@gmail.com.)