DEAR ABBY: My brother's wife is pregnant, and there is talk about their moving to the state where her family lives. There are only three people in my sister-in-law's family (one is elderly and two others work full time) who may provide her with support during her transition into motherhood. On the other hand, there are 10 of us who could help them emotionally and physically if they stay here.
My sister-in-law plans on being a stay-at-home mom, which I wholeheartedly support. My brother would move to the state where her family resides only in order to appease her. Our family is closer than her family. I feel we can provide them with more love and support than her family. What can I say or do to show them that living near our family is the best decision? -- NEAR IS BETTER
DEAR NEAR: I'm sure you mean well, but do not make the mistake of trying to "sell" your sister-in-law on staying. It appears her mind is made up. If she feels she would be more comfortable with her own family as she approaches this milestone, not much you can say will dissuade her. Of course, nothing prevents you from telling your brother how you feel, if you haven't already.
You might also suggest they consider renting for a year rather than buying a home right away, to see how they like it. That way, once the baby arrives and reality hits, she may realize she won't have the support she may need, and they may decide to return.