DEAR ABBY: My college-aged granddaughter is no longer speaking to me, answering my phone calls or allowing her other grandmother (who raised her) to post anything on Facebook where I can see what she is doing.
My granddaughter came to live with me last summer because she worked a summer job here. I asked her if she was gay, not because I think she is but as a prelude to a conversation about not allowing other girls to recruit her into a same-sex relationship as I saw in college and while teaching public school. Although I tried to explain, things have grown progressively worse.
My son and her mother married when she was 7 and divorced when she was 13. Over the years, I worked hard to develop and maintain a relationship with her. Now, she has told the other grandmother that she will never speak to me again. Was what I did so bad, and what should I do now? -- OTHER GRANDMOTHER IN NORTH CAROLINA
DEAR OTHER: What you said wasn't "bad," but it was misinformed and heavy-handed. While same-sex relationships do happen in high school and college, young people don't usually indulge unless they are already at least bi-curious. Even then, straight people don't suddenly "turn gay."
Your granddaughter may still be trying to figure out her sexual orientation, which could be why she has reacted so strongly. If you are wise, you will allow her the time she needs to sort it out, rather than push or panic.