DEAR ABBY: I had a baby a year ago. I'm 46, and my son's father just turned 50. We are looking to buy a house, but I am conflicted. We are not married, and it will be my money that we use for the down payment. I have expressed that I would like to be married before we buy the house, but nothing has happened. I have brought the subject up several times, but I now feel really nervous about his not following through. How should I proceed from here? -- DOWN PAYMENT DILEMMA IN NEW YORK
DEAR D.P.D.: That the father of your baby keeps "forgetting" to address the fact that you want to be married is a red flag. It appears he is unwilling to make that commitment. Before moving forward with buying property with someone who is reluctant to make a commitment, it is extremely important that you discuss this with a lawyer. An attorney can help to ensure your financial interests will be protected. Until you have done that, keep your checkbook firmly closed.