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by Abigail Van Buren

Little Is Left to Marriage After Years of Pain and Infidelity

DEAR ABBY: I have been with "John" for 18 years. We married while he was in prison. I know I have outgrown him, but I'm scared to say it's over in case I realize later that we should be together. Over the years, we have both cheated and hurt each other.

I don't know exactly what I am holding onto with him. There doesn't seem to be anyone else out there to choose from, so maybe I should stay. I'm not afraid to be alone, but I am confused. I am suffering from depression over this. Please help. -- STUCK IN DES MOINES

DEAR STUCK: If the only reason you haven't left John is that there's no one else around to choose from, it's understandable that you would be depressed. The status quo isn't fair for you or your husband.

As I see it, you have two choices: Fix your marriage or leave. Of course, the better option would be for you and John to have counseling to see if your love can be revived. However, if it doesn't work, then it might be better for you both to separate. The reason there is no one else out there right now may be that you are unavailable.

Read more in: Marriage & Divorce | Mental Health