DEAR ABBY: Last Saturday, two days before my 75th birthday, I did something very uncharacteristic of me. I went to a tattoo parlor 25 miles away and had a flower put on my right buttock. I don't intend to tell anyone. It was my birthday present to myself.
This was not a spur-of-the-moment impulse. I have told my husband many times that if I made it to 75, I might celebrate it with a tattoo. He just laughed it off. No one in our family has one, and in the past, I have been critical of them. But this one does not show.
Now I have to find a way to tell my husband. He has an explosive temper that goes on and on, and he never drops an issue -- ever. I need advice, and soon. Help me, will you? -- SITTING ON A SECRET
DEAR SITTING ON A SECRET: How do you know you are the first in your family to get a tattoo? If someone else also got one in a place that doesn't show, would they have told you after you told everyone you didn't like tattoos?
You can't hide this from your husband forever, so don't try. If he reacts badly, remind him that the buttock with the flower belongs to you and that at 75, you're a big girl who didn't need anyone else's consent.
Now it's time to give yourself another birthday present: Refuse to listen to your husban's verbal abuse, and you'll be much happier.