DEAR ABBY: I don't have a car. I can't afford one at this time. For the last two years a friend has been doing me a favor by taking me grocery shopping every week. I can (and do) take the bus to the local grocery store, but it makes it easier to buy things in bulk with a car. We have dinner, go to an occasional movie and generally have a good time hanging out. I buy her dinner sometimes as a thank-you for her great help.
Recently, I got to meet a group of her friends. She introduced me to every single person by going over the whole history of my not having a car, and how she has taken me grocery shopping every week. All her friends began praising her for her kindness. I was upset and embarrassed that rather than introduce me as a friend she instead portrayed me as an object of her charity.
I always thought she enjoyed our get-togethers. She used to rebuff any attempts on my part to make our shopping trips less frequent. Do I suck it up for the sake of our friendship, or do I discontinue or curtail our meetings? -- EMBARRASSED IN MICHIGAN
DEAR EMBARRASSED: What your "benefactor" did was extremely insensitive. True acts of charity are done anonymously. For now, my advice is to suck it up not for the sake of the friendship, but to do so for the sake of the transportation unless you can find an alternative.