DEAR ABBY: I am a 45-year-old single male with a job I enjoy. Last June, a cousin who is close to my age married for the second time. He married a girl 20 years younger whom he had known less than six months.
Although I was unable to attend the wedding, I sent them a nice card with a generous cash gift. I never received a thank-you note for it and although I was offended, I overlooked their rudeness.
Six weeks later, my cousin's new bride called my place of employment and left an "emergency" message to phone her. (She left a second one with a neighbor of mine.) Very worried and not knowing what to expect, I called her immediately.
The "emergency" turned out to be a request for a loan of $500. I was angry but tried not to show it. After thinking about it, I agreed to the loan, although my cousin's wife had hinted that I should give them a larger amount. We agreed on a repayment plan.
I had misgivings about helping them, but somehow my aunt -- my cousin's mother -- became involved. She kept insisting I lend them the money. (They were living with her at the time.)
It has been more than eight months and they have made no effort to pay me back. To make matters worse, they avoid me. My aunt acts as though it's all right for them to treat me this way. I am angry, hurt and feel my trust has been betrayed. What do you think I should do now? -- USED IN MISSOURI
DEAR USED: I think you should write off the loan and thank your lucky stars that you weren't conned into giving this deadbeat couple more money. If you are asked for more -- which isn't out of the realm of possibility -- you can now say, "No, because you didn't repay the first loan I gave you." Think about it. You may have gotten off cheap.