DEAR ABBY: One of my fond memories of my father when I was growing up was that he would always order my mom's meal when we were out for dinner. Of course, she decided what she wanted to eat, but when the waiter came, my dad would always say, "My wife would like the...." Now that I'm older and married, my husband does the same for me.
One couple we dine out with regularly gives me a difficult time about this "tradition." They make comments like, "Oh, Susan's not allowed to speak in a restaurant." The wife has also told me she thinks it's disrespectful to me when my husband orders my food. I have explained that it was a cherished memory of mine and not something forced on me. It's like when a man opens a door for a woman. I can definitely open the door myself, but I appreciate the sweet gesture.
I try to respect opinions that differ from my own, and I don't expect everyone to do as I do. Do you think I'm living in the Stone Age? -- SUSAN IN VIRGINIA
DEAR SUSAN: No, I do not; you appear to be living quite happily in the present. While the tradition you and your husband are observing is "antiquated," you are hurting no one.
Please allow me to make an observation: When couples dine out together socially, they are supposed to relax, entertain each other and have a good time. Giving you "heartburn" regarding who orders your dinner is rude, particularly since this couple has done it more than once and has been given an explanation. From my perspective, you might enjoy your evenings out more if you shared them with this particular couple less often.