DEAR ABBY: I am 42 years old and being married for the first time in October. My parents divorced more than 20 years ago and both remarried. My father will walk me down the aisle.
Dad lost my stepmother two years ago, and is still having a hard time with it emotionally. Because of my age, I don't expect anything from my parents except their emotional support.
If it's all right with my parents, do you think it would be appropriate to put on the invitations, "In lieu of gifts, please make a donation to the American Cancer Society in memory of (my stepmother's name)"? -- LOVING DAUGHTER IN ARLINGTON, TEXAS
DEAR LOVING DAUGHTER: You are a sweetheart to think of it, but doing so would be a huge breach of etiquette. In fact, any mention of gifts on a wedding invitation is a no-no. The way to handle it is, when asked where you are registered for gifts, to verbally inform the questioner what your wishes are.