DEAR ABBY: My grandfather died recently, and I missed some school because I went to his funeral out of state. When people ask me where I went and I tell them, they ask if I'm going to be OK and say how sorry they are. They all act like they expect me to break down and start crying any second.
The problem is, I didn't really know my grandfather that well. He lived across the country, and the few times I got to visit him I can honestly say I didn't really like him -- if you're even allowed to say that about a grandparent.
How am I supposed to tell these people that I am not broken up about him dying, and I'm not going to burst into tears any time soon? -- NOT CRYING IN IOWA
DEAR NOT CRYING: It is not necessary to say that to anyone to whom you aren't close. All you need to say is, "Thank you for offering your sympathy. It was nice of you to do that." Then change the subject by asking the person what he or she has been doing.