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by Abigail Van Buren

'In Vino Veritas' Reveals

PAINFUL TRUTH OF MARRIAGE

DEAR ABBY: The other day I asked my husband a question and told him to be honest. If given a choice between giving up wine or giving up sex with me, which would he choose?

You guessed it. He said, "Giving up sex with you." I think I knew the answer before I asked the question, but hearing it out loud devastated me.

I know every woman wants to be No. 1 in her husband's life. Am I wrong to feel so heartbroken? -- LOST THE BATTLE TO CHARDONNAY

DEAR LOST THE BATTLE: Not at all, particularly if you prefer sex to a full-bodied Cabernet. But now it's time for a follow-up question: "Why?" If sex with you is less interesting to your mate than his vino, he may have an alcohol problem. Or the problem may lie in your bedroom.

One thing is certain: When you asked your question, you "uncorked" the fact that there's a serious problem in your marriage. And now you have an opportunity to do something about it.