DEAR ABBY: Please tell me your position on this. Are adult children supposed to take an aging mother with them on vacation? If not, what is a gentle way to say no when the parent invites herself? Please help us. -- UNSURE IN OHIO
DEAR UNSURE: I think it depends upon the relationship between the mother and "child." It also depends upon the purpose of the vacation. If a couple is going away to relax and bond more closely with each other, they do not need a third wheel -- regardless of how much they might love her. And the way to say that is, "We need some alone time, Mom. Please understand."