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by Abigail Van Buren

Husband Builds Verbal Walls Between Wife and Her Friends

DEAR ABBY: Our son lived with his girlfriend for several years. They had a beautiful daughter together but split up a year and a half later. His ex-girlfriend now lives with another man, and they have a new baby girl. They'll probably get married.

Our granddaughter is now 5 and we pick her up, take her places and do things with her. We also buy her the usual gifts for her birthday and holidays. We travel frequently and bring her souvenirs from our travels.

Now that she has a baby sister, are we obligated to do the same for her? Or should we continue doing for our granddaughter only? What is the proper thing here? -- HELP NEEDED IN ALABAMA

DEAR HELP NEEDED: Put yourself in the position of the younger sister and imagine how she will feel when she's older and she's left behind or forgotten. If you exclude her completely, I guarantee it will cause resentment and division between the girls, so open your heart. Be inclusive and generous -- not only for her sake, but also for your granddaughter's.