DEAR ABBY: I never married "Mark," the father of my 20-year-old son, "Joel," and Mark didn't appear in Joel's life until he was 12. Mark had a relationship with Joel for about two years, then moved to another state.
I learned last night that Mark has died. Joel is a few hours away at college. Should I tell him on the phone or in person? -- UNDECIDED IN STOCKBRIDGE, GA.
DEAR UNDECIDED: If the situation were reversed, what would you prefer? While Mark and Joel have not been close, your son has still lost his father. To tell him in person would be the kind thing to do.