DEAR ABBY: My nephew is being married this summer in an outdoor garden wedding. He casually mentioned that his future mother-in-law plans to purchase several large planters with live plants from a housewares store to use for the ceremony. She then intends to return the planters for a refund, saying, "They didn't work out."
I consider this to be totally unethical. My family agrees, but because the bride's family is paying most of the wedding costs, we feel it is inappropriate to speak up.
Now I'm beginning to wonder about the morals of the family into which my nephew is marrying. But since I'm only a relative, I can't say anything without starting trouble. What do you think? -- DREADING THE WEDDING, ANAHEIM, CALIF.
DEAR DREADING THE WEDDING: There's a saying, "All that's needed for evil to flourish is for good people to say nothing." If you and the family have already made your opinions known, then you have done enough. But while you're "wondering about the morals of the family into which your nephew is marrying," you should also wonder about the ethics and morals of a young man who would allow this to be done on one of the most sacred occasions in his life. Shame on him for not speaking up.
As to this practice being harmless, many companies have eliminated return policies because of it. So everyone gets hurt.