DEAR ABBY: I hope you can answer this quickly. I'm about to start doing my Christmas cards. I keep a list of people I send cards to, so that I don't miss anyone. I also make a note if I don't receive a card from someone.
What is your opinion on removing someone from our list if we don't hear from that person for two or three years? Should I assume that the individual is mad at me, doesn't like Christmas cards, or no longer wants to be "bothered"? I'm sure I'm not alone with this question. -- PRACTICAL IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR PRACTICAL: To ascribe a motive for not hearing from someone is counterproductive. I believe in direct communication, and that's what I'm suggesting for you. Pick up the phone, tell your friend you are concerned because it has been so long since you have heard from him or her -- and ask why.
There are several reasons why someone may not have exchanged cards with you. A few that spring immediately to mind are: an illness that prevented it, the family may have moved and not received the cards you have sent, or because of the increasing popularity of online greetings, people are sending fewer Christmas cards in the mail.