DEAR ABBY: I am a 61-year-old man who has been faithful in his 35-year marriage. But I am very unhappy because I am continually hounded by my wife about previous mistakes I have committed. The incidents involved alcohol and smoking, and occurred many years ago. She has never forgiven me and brings up the subject frequently.
My wife has withdrawn sex from me for 20 years because of her jealousy about my love for my mother. (Mom died in 1994.)
I am so alone, but my wife will not seek counseling. If someone would just hug me. I feel like I'm huddled in a corner and ... FREEZING TO DEATH IN KANSAS
DEAR FREEZING TO DEATH: A sentence should fit the crime, and after 35 years you have been punished enough. Because your wife refuses to seek counseling to heal this fractured marriage doesn't mean that you shouldn't talk to a counselor. It's something you should have done years ago.
If you are reluctant to do it for yourself, then do it for your wife. You're not the only partner in this relationship who is huddled in a corner freezing. So is she, even if it's by her own choice.