DEAR ABBY: I have six good friends who live together. When they answer the phone, I never know who I'm talking to. I always say, "This is Vanessa," but they never reply by volunteering their names.
Is it reasonable to expect them to identify themselves? I have considered asking them to, but never have. I'm not sure if it would be presumptuous or not. -- CONFUSED IN COLUMBIA, MO.
DEAR CONFUSED: When you identify yourself, I would think that the response would be, "Oh, hi, Vanessa! It's 'Julie.' How are you?" However, since that's not the response you're getting, it's certainly not presumptuous to ask, "... and who is this?" Or, "With whom am I having the pleasure?" That's what I'd do.