DEAR ABBY: My friend -- I'll call her "Dina" -- has a difficult time getting pregnant. All the tests she had done came back normal. They can't find anything wrong with her, but she can't conceive. Dina does not want to adopt. She loves kids, but she wants one of her own.
It is very difficult to tell her to relax and take it easy. I tried telling her that, but she keeps getting frustrated all the time, and now it's affecting her sex life and her marriage. Any ideas? -- CAREFREE IN SEASIDE, CALIF
DEAR CAREFREE: Your friend's problem is more common than you may think. Telling her to "relax and take it easy" was the wrong thing to do, however well-meant. She is hurting, and every monthly cycle that goes by is a reminder. Much as you might like to, you can't make the situation "better."
My advice to you is to suggest that Dina and her husband talk with a fertility specialist, and possibly a psychotherapist, to help her deal with her pain, frustration, disappointment and anger.