DEAR ABBY: I am 25, single and hard-working. I am also pregnant. The father, "Zack," is married and expecting his first child in August. I'm due in October.
I met Zack at a bar. I wasn't looking for a serious relationship, just a fun evening. Zack seemed like a nice guy. He never said he was involved with anyone, let alone married, and he wasn't wearing a ring. Well, our night of passion has now led to a lifetime of concern.
Zack doesn't want me to "ruin his marriage," and I don't want to be called a homewrecker. I initially didn't want him involved at all, but reality has set in and I will need his financial help.
Once my baby is born, Zack will be taking a blood test to establish paternity. My family knows nothing about all this, but it's hard to hide. It will be even harder once the court comes into play regarding child support.
How should I break it to them? Should I be ashamed? I don't think so, because I didn't know Zack was married -- so why is he burdening me with the guilt of ruining his marriage? -- MOTHER-TO-BE IN NEW JERSEY
DEAR MOTHER-TO-BE: Tell your family in plain English about what's going on, because you are going to need their emotional support in the months to come. Clearly, you will get none from Zack because he will have his hands full explaining this child to his wife.
Should you be ashamed? Unless you consider having unprotected sex with a stranger you met at a bar one of your prouder moments, I think you should.