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by Abigail Van Buren

Wife Scratching Her Head Over Soldier Itching to Fight

DEAR ABBY: My husband has been in the Army for eight years and has never had the opportunity to serve overseas. His unit is now at the top of Uncle Sam's list for overseas deployment, and I am scared to death. He was recently offered a full-time position with the Air Force, where he would be stateside until he retires.

We have three children under the age of 3. I know that more than anything my children and I need him around. He refuses to even consider the offer and can't wait to go into combat and leave us behind. This has caused many arguments during the past few months, but he still won't budge.

As a soldier's wife, I know there are sacrifices to be made, but am I selfish to want him to stay here at home where it's safe? -- SOLDIER'S WIFE IN COLORADO

DEAR SOLDIER'S WIFE: Selfish? No. Human, yes. However, your husband is career military -- and the possibility of combat is a reality that goes along with it. It will take courage and resiliency on your part, but you will not face the separation -- or the risk -- alone. The families of everyone in your husband's unit, not to mention those already deployed, experience the same separation anxiety. I hope you all can emotionally support each other. There is strength in numbers.