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by Abigail Van Buren

Young Adult Now Is Grateful for Parents Who Were Strict

DEAR ABBY: I just finished reading the letter from "Teen Held Captive" who complained about her parents (especially her dad) being too strict.

I went through the same thing with my parents. I'm now 25 and mature enough to understand that their actions when I was 16 were motivated only by the purest and deepest love for me and my siblings, for which I am thankful.

Some of my friends whose parents were too permissive used drugs, drank alcohol, became promiscuous and got pregnant or took risks that carried bad consequences. Because of my parents, I graduated from a university, achieved my personal and professional goals, and have nothing to regret. -- BEEN THERE TOO, AND HAPPY ABOUT IT, GARDEN GROVE, CALIF.

DEAR BEEN THERE: I received a ton of mail in response to that letter. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: My best friend was constantly grounded for a month or more at a time for the smallest infraction. It made her angry and frustrated, which caused her to go crazy with the sense of freedom when she was able to get out from under her father's controlling eye. On her first night of freedom after being grounded, she put herself in a dangerous situation and got herself killed. She was only trying to have as much fun as she could in the short time she had before having to be back under her father's thumb. -- THE FLIP SIDE IN TEXAS

DEAR FLIP SIDE: You have described a tragedy -- and a parent's ultimate fear.