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by Abigail Van Buren

Cruel Words Aimed at Kids Cut Deep and Heal Slow

DEAR ABBY: I am pregnant with my second son. My first is 4 1/2, and I have saved everything of his. A friend of the family wants to host a baby shower. My husband and I think it is greedy to have another shower when we already have everything we need. Abby, what is the proper etiquette, if any? -- SON SET IN OREGON

DEAR SON SET: A baby shower is a celebration of a new life to come. Participating in a baby shower for your second child isn't greedy.

However, if accepting gifts you don't really need makes you feel guilty, have your friend announce a charity shower and make it clear that the gifts you receive will be donated to a women's shelter, a church or some similar organization. Alternatively, you could donate the items you saved from your first son to a family or young mother who needs them.